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Even today, he keeps them in a hidden place and occasionally reads them so as not to forget the disgusting things he experienced from the man who was supposed to be his protector and guardian.
Heidi also has a daughter who is now four years old. When she is old enough, Heidi plans to tell her everything she has lived through because she believes that it is necessary to talk about those things, otherwise she will never stop.
– Part of the diary is in a locked box, part on my laptop. Not a day goes by that I don’t read at least part of it because I think it is very important not to forget even the smallest detail.. Yes, I have a hard time reliving it every day, but I think it’s the best way – says Heidi.
When he realized that his sister was going through the same thing, he had to react.Photo: Profimedia
She refused to talk about everything for 10 years. She didn’t say a word to her mother, her brother Tom, or her sister Chloe. And then when she found out that her father had abused Chloe, who is eight years younger than Heidi. Then it exploded. All his life he tried to hide his dark secret and at the same time protect his brother and sister, and he failed at that..
– I was abused for years and made sure Chloe was not left alone with her father. I did my best. I thought it was okay for him to suffer, if he had to, if it meant the rest of the family would be okay. And then when I found out that Chloe was in pain too, I felt physical pain. That was my little sister and I would do anything to protect her – says Heidi.
Heidi has been abused since she was seven years old. It started when her father forced her to take off her clothes and applied lotion to her body. Then he lay down on her and began rubbing her body. This was followed by the obligation to kiss on the mouth and then the obligation to have sex. Every time she found five pounds in her room, she knew it was a sign from her father to keep track of more abuse.
She followed her sister’s diary closely to make sure she wasn’t going through the same thing. And then one day he saw Chloe, who was 11 years old at the time, wrote that her dad made her kiss him and touch him.
Heidi believes that these things should be discussed openlyPhoto: Profimedia
So Heidi brought out the truth and reported everything to the police. The problem arose when Chloe refused to make a statement. Tom did not believe that all this happened, but he believed his father, who stated that Heidi tried to poison him, and then fled the city.
– It was a very difficult period. I wanted to protect Chloe at all costs and she wouldn’t let me.. When I look at everything now, I think I would have been silent for life if I hadn’t found her diary, and I don’t think I could have lived with it without telling anyone – says Heidi, who insists that children should be parts of the body, what is inappropriate contact and the right to rebel.
Hajda’s father was eventually sentenced to seven years in prison.
– When he was convicted, I did not have the feeling that justice was served. I was sad because things could have been very different. He could have had a really good father. I regret everything that happened – says Heidi, who also wrote the book “I’m afraid to say” about her experience.
(mirror.co.uk)
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