I just wanted to get out alive, nothing else interested me



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Everything that has happened in recent days in the case of actress Daniela Steinfeld, who accused her colleague Branislav Lecic of rape, shows that her fears were justified – she was silent for years because she assumed that in such a society – in addition to Institutions – You’d have to prove it to the public victim, Insider writes. The prosecution took over the entire case, but the public was divided.

“I could never have dreamed that you told me a year or two ago that I would sit down and talk with you and talk about this. I would say that will never happen. I had to heal, I had to find the strength and courage to face the fact. that he was going to speak in public ”, explains Daniela Steinfeld in extensive confession to the insider.

The story of Daniela Steinfeld and the process she went through and is really going through in the best way shows what the largest number of victims who are silent about it are going through. That’s why her story is important, Insider reported.

“When I came to the United States, I didn’t fully know that my body was actually enduring the trauma so hard. I didn’t sleep at all, I had terrible insomnia and a lack of appetite. I wanted to drink and I never drank alcohol, which was unusual for me. Then all of a sudden flashbacks and a flashback led to a panic attack on the street and I was out of breath. I could no longer go out on the street and I was afraid of people who were unknown, if I saw a black car in the street. street, where he led me to that place, all that made me have a panic attack ”, says Daniela and adds:

“It took me longer to say, anonymously, that I called that hotline anonymously in America, the word rape. I said that word only after three or four years, after what happened to me.” a state of mind that was completely disturbed, “says Daniela.

She says it took her a long time to gather the courage to tell her parents that she had experienced such a heinous crime.

“I didn’t want to tell my parents right away, because I understood that they would feel very helpless. I thought that they would see me like this, that they would see the face of my attacker on television and that they could not do anything about it. It is a feeling of helplessness and guessing. how painful it would be for the parents. For the same reason, I didn’t want to say that to my classmates, because I knew that their hearts would break because of my pain and trauma, and on the other hand, they should continue to cooperate with him “, says Daniela .

Daniela Steinfeld revealed that she was a victim of rape in her documentary “Heal Me”, shown at the Sarajevo Film Festival last year. At the time, however, she did not want to reveal the name of the man who refused to listen to her: “no.”

“I live with my mental state, which was disturbed. I was scared, crying. He was constantly falling into panic attacks. I thought that it would be my whole life and that I could never tell anyone, that I could not do my job normally, that is my profession and my greatest passion, it was very devastating for me. It had no internal or external support pillars. I didn’t want to kill myself on impulse, but I thought it was the most rational thing to do. I couldn’t understand that there was light at the end of the tunnel, ”she confided, adding that her doctors diagnosed her with a post-traumatic disorder, for which she was treated for two years.

“I was treated for PTSD for about two years. At that time, I couldn’t function normally as a person, to feel safe in many places. It was almost closed, if I had to go to auditions and there was someone in that place who remind me of him, I would have difficulty breathing and then leave those rooms. It is painful, when you look at yourself and all your strength and confidence in yourself, you have lost your normal functioning. From there, I was treated with various doctors and institutions with psychiatrists and psychotherapists. At one point, I was the subject of research on post-traumatic stress at the Columbia Institute. It is proof that abuse and seizure happened, the functioning of the brain can be measured in fact. It is very easy to diagnose the consequences of a trauma. When you are a victim of abuse, there is no possibility that you will not suffer the consequences of the trauma. It is one of the worst attacks to which a person can survive, ”said Daniela.

She did that just last week. She came to Serbia from the United States for a few days just to give a statement to the prosecution, that is, to say the name of the colleague she accuses of rape. The day before returning to New York, he recounted everything that happened to him. Insider interview.

“My feeling while I was in that house those few hours is that I just want to get out alive, I was not interested in anything else. The moment I saw what was going to happen, I couldn’t function, I couldn’t speak, ”said Daniela.

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