– Desperate Situation – VG

Several parents have expressed their dissatisfaction with the fact that the organizer of the Human Ethics Association only gives access to one of the parents to follow the ceremony during the bourgeois confirmations in Oslo and Bergen.

In Oslo, a lottery is proposed in cases where the parents do not reach an agreement, according to the local newspaper Nordre Aker Budstikke.

The Human Ethics Association, which this year organizes confirmations for 12,500 15-year-olds, recalls that the background of the limited participation is the crown situation.

Maximum 200 participants

– After several evaluations, we have decided that the ceremonies will take place as planned, although only one of the parents of the confirmants can participate. This is due to the crown guidelines with a maximum limit of 200 participants. 80-90 confirmants participate per. ceremony, says the communications manager of the Human Ethics Association Marit Øimoen to VG.

– Do you understand that some parents and confirmations think it can be shocking that only one parent is present and the possible use of a lottery?

– Yes, I have no problem understanding it. At the same time, it is important to note that this is the day of the confirmer, responds Marit Øimoen, who herself had a confirmer a few years ago.

Remember that the ceremonies in Oslo and Bergen are the largest the association has and that various possibilities have been considered.

– After a thorough evaluation, we came to the conclusion that it is safer to reduce it this way. If we had divided into several ceremonies, we could have had to spread them over several weekends, which means that many families had to cancel and change companies. This is something that most people don’t want either, explains Øimoen.

The Human-Ethical Association confirms that they have received reactions from parents who are not satisfied.

The daughter of Nina Kraugerud Ertzaas is among those to be confirmed civilly in Oslo.

– It is not possible to ask a teenager to choose between his parents like that! Our daughter has said that we must agree to this, because it will be too difficult for her. And those families where the parents don’t live together? Here, the Human Ethics Association puts young people in a reasonably desperate situation, says Nina Kraugerud Ertzaas in a comment to VG.

– Confirmation is a family party, and although everyone understands that there is a state of emergency this year, I must say that I am surprised and disappointed that the Human-Ethical Association does not do more to adapt to the situation, for example by having several more ceremonies short. so that the confirmer can at least bring his parents with him. The church has accomplished this. As we are talking about the City Council here, I thought they could be better organized, continues Kraugerud Ertzaas.

You want a proper ceremony

– Have you considered shorter ceremonies with fewer confirmations and more parents present per. confirming, Marit Øimoen at the Association for Human Ethics?

– We have considered this in this special situation, but we decided that it is important that the confirmants and their families have a proper ceremony, which brings peace, joy and a breath of fresh air from busy daily life, Øimo responds.

He adds that the setting of the ceremony is important.

– Music, cultural contributions, speeches with good content: a good feeling of experiencing something different from what you usually experience. This is what makes ceremonies important to us humans throughout life. This year’s confirmers will also receive it, he says.

– Responsibility of parents to find a solution

Confirming parents Jonny and Irene Becher Eriksen in Bergen are in turn pleased with their experience of the ceremony at Bergen’s Grieg Hall for their daughter Kaja.

– We were well prepared in advance for this to be a special ceremony. It was very nice, and it was a calm and good atmosphere also for us who followed the ceremony from home. This was the day of the confirmer. So it is the responsibility of the parents to find a solution on which of them will be present during the ceremony, says mother Irene Becher Eriksen to VG.

Together with Kaja’s father, Jonn, he came to the conclusion that he stayed home with the guests and followed the ceremony live, while Jonny participated in the ceremony itself.

They recall that the alternative had not been a ceremony and a mail confirmation certificate or some kind of impersonal speed confirmation.

Headdress dad

– Two weeks before the event, we were notified that a maximum of 200 people could be present. In hindsight, we are happy that a wonderful and comprehensive ceremony was organized for Kaja, with a fantastic speech and cultural elements, instead of our daughter receiving a confirmation certificate in the mail, says Dad Jonny Becher Eriksen to VG.

An occasionally excited father boasts of a memorable hour-long ceremony, where comedian and humanist Tore Petterson delivered the confirmation speech while famed artists Eirik Søfteland and Nathalie Nordnes contributed musical elements.