Vilnius woman decided to teach her son at home: she would not go back to public school



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As Samanta herself says, the reasons for her decision to opt for family education were not just one, and she had already thought about it before, but this year she finally decided to take on the role of teacher herself. A woman already sees the benefits of such training.

He raises his son in the family.

The idea of ​​raising a child in the family has been on the mind of the interlocutor before, it seemed the most suitable way for their family, and the quarantine introduced last year became a test and finally pushed them to choose what is now the son of Samantha. has to do at home.

“It’s not clear, it’s a school, it’s quarantined, you need masks, you don’t need them. There is a completely ambiguous situation that with less damage to the nerves, we finally decided to decide to start a family. We had planned in the past, we really know all the advantages, but we had a very good teacher in public school, so we stayed there for the first two years, but we decided to go back to our original ways of perceiving. In school everything is a system, there children learn to learn, I don’t know it encourages motivation, it is not adapted to individual needs ”, said S. Zacharova.

Another reason why the family decided to take this step was the change of teacher in the public school, which did not meet the expectations of the family, and the teaching methods used did not seem acceptable.

As of this September, Samanta’s son is studying a little differently than usual for many: he goes to a private school 1-2 days a week and the following days he studies at home with the help of his parents. It is true that the woman emphasizes that calling it family counseling is wrong: “In terms, home counseling is when a teacher comes home, and the way we teach is called family education.”

To start raising a child in the family, Samantai needed to obtain two certificates, followed by interviews with the school and the signing of a contract.

“In June, two certificates had to be obtained from the municipality and the rights of the child, that the family was not included in the list of antisocial families, that there was no drunkenness or drug use, violence. Then, with that certificate, you must apply to the desired school where the family education contract is signed. After all, the child enrolls in the new school and since September they go to meetings with the teacher, they discuss when arrangements are made, individual consultations, “said the interlocutor.

Learning at home

Does not publish the schedule

When asked if things look like her son’s studies at home, the woman says she doesn’t follow the 45-minute lesson rule. After all, this is the essence of family education: spending more time on what is most difficult for a child to adapt to his needs.

“We try to learn less, but with better quality, so that there are not ten topics in my head and two of them are remembered. We believe that it is better to cover fewer topics, but to cover them better so that you can remember, learn, make it interesting and benefit from it.

When a child has individual access, it comes in a way that when he needs more time, effort, he has more. Let’s say you do math really fast, and the Lithuanian language has more time to dive into something, explore it, learn something.

At school: 45 minutes of math, 45 minutes of Lithuanian and you can’t get out of those frames, you do it according to how everyone does it. And this is where it adapts to individual learning needs, ”said Zacharova.

Zacharova’s son’s own homework is planned for the week based on a general education plan. The best model for Samanta’s family is to make a weekly plan of what tasks to do and not put your child in the frame, at what time or on what day they should be done. The woman smiles because she is only helping the child to plan the time to reach the weekly goals set.

“I assigned tasks to how many there should be a week and then he looks at himself according to the weather, maybe he will do something more today, maybe less tomorrow.” It’s different, if I have more free time we do something together, if not, he chooses to do exercises, for example, ”said the interlocutor.

Teaches independence

When raising a child in the family, Samanta and her husband always try not only to transmit information to the child, but also to integrate teaching into everyday life, to carry out various activities at home, as well as to organize trips and introduce the history of Lithuania as often as possible.

“It’s not just sitting at home, training is in progress. Suppose I buy something, give a return count. It’s an integrated teaching system where learning almost always takes place. Let’s say if I bake a cake, I give it proportions. to look, count milliliters.

We have learned a lot not only at home, but there are still trips, let’s say excursions, we are also learning through documentaries. Children love it very much. Sometimes he reads about a mound, after a year he asks and doesn’t remember anything. But if we go somewhere, he looks, he connects with the story, then he remembers better. “

Boy at school

Homeschooling also promotes the child’s independence: a woman says she is more of a help when it comes to explaining a new topic to her child or helping him deepen what he is learning, but above all she encourages her child to seek information about her. own.

“He has all kinds of books, encyclopedias, I keep saying that there are books, try to look, first look, if you don’t understand, then come see, let’s explain. I try to integrate the habit of searching for information myself. This is very important to me because from a psychological point of view, when a child makes an effort, he seeks, goes, makes, remembers much better. For him, it is a challenge: if I do not understand, I came, I looked at myself, I found myself, I solved the task myself. This way of learning is mastered much better ”, explained the woman.

Zacharova does not hide that the son’s motivation was extremely low last year with the start of distance education, and now he sees that education in the family gives the first fruits and his motivation has increased significantly.

There are challenges, but you see the benefits

When asked if there are days when the son is reluctant to sit at school, the woman smiles saying that everything is there, but that there are no large barrels, so she helps the son organize his time so that he can follow the rhythm of tasks. and have free time to travel in circles. or do whatever you want.

“We agreed that there would definitely be no big goats, we did not say that we would do it according to our plan, because we still have to leave the curriculum, we need to learn the factor, the adjective, the adjective. We have no major complaints. Of course, there is everything you don’t want or try to postpone later, then I say that if there is more work later, it still happens, ”said S. Zacharova.

When she begins to co-parent her child, traveling to school 1 or 2 times a week, Samanta is glad that when the child studies at home, she has more free time to be able to teach additional things. Currently, the son is not only studying the subjects provided in the curriculum, but also learning about entrepreneurship and psychology.

However, there are also difficulties: how to motivate a child to learn, to develop his independence, but not to frame and not to create an overly disciplined environment in which he feels the pressure:

“Probably the biggest challenge is with motivation and control, not pushing too hard, not disciplining, not being the strict teacher that you are now sitting, going and doing, however, I know that those things decrease motivation when there is too much discipline, punishment, it makes me seem to run away from problems or to do, inform and get away from myself ”.

Another challenge is parenting time. The interlocutor says that she does not know how to raise a child in the family if she works in the office from 8 am to 5 pm, but works with her husband from home, so that she can dedicate enough time to teaching her son and, if it is If necessary, decide with the child at what time to interpret the theme.

School

I would not go back to public school

The woman emphasizes that many seem to lack socialization when raising a child in the family. In the case of Samanta’s son, this is definitely not the case: he travels to a sports club every day, where he interacts with children of all ages.

“Many people think that a child lacks socialization, but I do not understand it at all. After all, a child does not sit at home all day, it is not the closure of a child at home: he attends various groups, goes Out on the patio. Those socializations are enough. It turns out that socializing isn’t just between your peers, but between a wide variety of people.

Of course, it also depends on the children, if they don’t attend anything it may not be very good, but even so, it depends as much on the children as on the family, many factors come together here ”, considers the interlocutor. .

Seeing the benefits of family education, Zacharova says she doesn’t think her child will ever go to school or study at home for a full week, but in the future the relationship between home study days and school may change. :

“Personally, I am not in favor of my son being educated 100 percent in the family, it depends on certain character traits, but I see that it would not be a good fit for him.

But it is not appropriate and one hundred percent in school, because we also went to first grade four times a week, taking a break one day, it was our time, we did what we wanted, we studied our own subjects.

I have no idea we’re going back to public school. A private school, mixed, but one hundred percent one way or another, no, we want to find that middle ground. “



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