After the death of an aunt, the march is prohibited from crossing municipal borders: the psychologist says he understands the logic of this decision

Movement restrictions have long been a source of anger for the country’s population, as even with the introduction of vaccines for seniors and other priority groups, they have yet to be lifted. Authorities promise before each holiday that this may be the last time they ask to stay home, but without an improvement in the epidemiological situation, people will not see such a change. However, there are exceptions to the movement restrictions.

A point about how to go to a funeral in another municipality could have raised serious questions about how the government treats the concept of what a family is. There was resentment in society again.

The police declare that funerals can only be attended in another municipality after the death of close relatives and the Civil Code of the Republic of Lithuania stipulates that close relatives up to and including the second degree (parents and children, grandparents and grandchildren) and second line relatives and siblings are recognized as close relatives (sisters).

“Funerals may be attended by a maximum of 10 people, excluding relatives and / or members of the household of the participants, people who provide ritual services,” says the explanation.

For the sake of clarity, the police also provided several examples:

“1) in case of death of the mother of Vardenis Pavardenis and funeral in another municipality, he and / or his children can go and his spouse cannot;

2) in the event of the death of the mother or grandmother of Vardenis Pavardenis and of the funerals in his municipality of residence, both he and his spouse may be present “;

In the example given, it is surprising that a wife would be prohibited from going to Anita’s funeral with her husband and children if they were held in another municipality. Some online commentators have called it “the juxtaposition of the rule of law with elemental humanity.”

The goal is to protect the living

The psychologist Edvardas Šidlauskas, however, in this case tended to support the government’s decision to reduce the risk of spreading the virus as much as possible. According to him, there are things that do not depend on us, but there are also things that we can change.

“In this case, as I understand it, it is a method to protect the living. It seems to me that this is much more important than the dead because they already have the same thing. That may sound cruel, but that is the reality. Of course, not I know if those methods are effective, here’s another question. On the other hand, nobody could answer this question exactly how many of those people can be allowed to be really safe, “he explained.

According to the psychologist, it is obvious in general that all family members want to say goodbye to the deceased relative, as well as, for example, the husband’s wife must attend Anita’s funeral.

“It can be really difficult for a man because his closest man on earth, meaning his mother, has come out of the closet. We will never make that connection with anyone again. Be it the wife’s mother and the next man, That support is certainly important. Of course, it would be great if everyone could participate, but if those laws seem to make any sense.

Most likely this is to protect the living, and on that basis, however, I would encourage compliance with the law and, above all, the protection of myself. Unfortunately, there is no way to help the deceased, and he can comfort his loved one, even after those two days, he may not die of pain.

E. Šidlauskas also explained what a funeral means from a psychological point of view. In principle, he says, they are not for the dead, but for the living, thus giving meaning to the duel and controlling it.

“It’s like putting it on a shelf, where, for example, placing a wreath, burying the dead means that symbolically we are melting away or losing that pain as well. These rituals are almost therapeutic and, for us living beings, they are useful as a kind of medicine.

Funerals shorten that period of mourning, the person no longer feels that they have done something and in principle everyone who was important to the deceased should attend. It doesn’t matter if it’s a family member or not, ”he said.

However, summed up E. Šidlauskas, unless the opposite turns out for the moment, psychologically we will pay the price that the duel lasts.