Jelena, who has escaped a faulty relationship with the Netherlands, has also lost 55 kg: today she urges women not to make their mistakes | Lifetime



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Everything changed after the first birth.

“The most important thing I want to say is to encourage women to love themselves. I hate child abuse if there are addictions in the family. Don’t wait for a beautiful day to take over and change. Don’t make my mistake.

If there is violence, be sure to call the police and record the incident, be ashamed of what people will say, do not listen to loved ones who advise not to seek help.

Living in such conditions is a psychological trauma not only for a woman, but also for children. Don’t let the kids see this. I left everything, the house, all the property, but I regained the peace of myself and my children, ”Jelena began the conversation.

She herself says that she has suffered for 11 years. It is true that in the past she is grateful for her three great daughters.

In childhood and adolescence, Jelena was always slim. At 21 she met her ex-husband. The couple soon had a firstborn. Although the woman gained 30 kg during pregnancy because she ate, as her mother and grandmother urged, for two, she expected to lose weight after giving birth. She lost only 10 kg, then another 5. At the time, Jelena, 167 cm tall, weighed 85 kg. Perhaps the woman would also have shed the remaining kilos, but family life has changed and so has her psychological state.

“My husband started using psychoactive substances. To keep him away from his friends, we went to live in the village. A few years later, I gave birth to a second baby girl and gained a lot of pounds again. But that was not the most important thing to me at the time.

The daughter developed epilepsy four months later. We spent a year and a half with her practically in hospitals because attacks were very common. When I had to go back to work two years later, atopic dermatitis and asthma contributed. As a result, hospitals had to sleep even more often, as up to 90% of patients were discharged. her body.

In order to stay home, I gave birth to a third girl. She was born prematurely, eight months. He weighed only two kilograms, he was so small that it was even scary to take him in my arms. The preterm labor was due to the man starting to use violence against me. Then, after giving birth, I was thinking very seriously about what to do next, ”the interlocutor opened.

Personal Album / Jelena Photo Album

Personal Album / Jelena Photo Album

I saw there is no plump dutch

Jelena does not hide her fear of being left alone with three children, one of whom is disabled. Both of her parents did not live in Lithuania and she did not think of emigrating at that time. Especially since the man was treated periodically in rehabilitation centers and did not consume for some time, and when the violence began he always apologized and assured me that it would never happen again.

But the third birth was the last straw. The unborn daughter was immediately put into resuscitation because her lungs were underdeveloped and she told me the chances of her survival were 50/50. At the same time, they put my second child on epilepsy resuscitation. I realized it was time to say “enough”.

However, another year and eight months passed before he made the final decision. During that time, I was also seriously ill: internal bleeding began. I remember calling my mom while she was in the hospital and asking me to take care of my children if she died.



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