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If nothing can stop viruses, wars, occupations, catastrophes or fear, that is love. The physical attraction between people and the need for contact is not limited.
This was demonstrated during the quarantine period and our 42-day lockdown in our homes. “Flirting has increased online, not only by teens, but also by older people,” psychologist and psychotherapist Areti Vergouli told APE-MPE.
“Man”, he says, “uses the Internet as another crutch to be able to manage the stress of being” out “on the one hand and satisfy his needs for contact or pleasure on the other.» The Internet, continues, and in particular the various applications have created a space where the person could “escape”, create a “potential reality”, meet what they would do in the bar in their neighborhood, be able to “hug” and essentially “live” without exposing themselves to the crown . “Flirting through the exchange of messages and photos worked as a way to express the imaginary.”
As he states, “love patterns and preferences, behaviors and social habits have been transformed into digital hybrids of what we knew in the pre-coronation era. In front of the screen, browsing social networks, ‘meetings’ are organized, erotic exchanges and photos are carried out, which makes the well-known sexting that until recently was the way in which adolescents play erotically “.
The agony of the threat of the crown.
“The increase in sexting,” says Vergouli, “among adults can be seen as an expression of existential anxiety about our identity, a search for meaning under the pressure of the external threat, the crown.” Through the prohibition of the fundamental need for social relationships and emotional ties, the man thus approves or rejects possible sexual partners with a movement of the mouse, flirts without tomorrow, with the transitory element as the dominant element, immediate satisfaction , to meet your own needs and wants. Liquidity, insecurity for tomorrow, makes him focus on speed and surface. Because he fears what this new situation will mean for himself, he prefers to resort to fantasy to feel happy. “
“That’s bad?”
The answer, says Ms Vergouli, is “no, to the extent that the fantasy of happiness does not conflict with your ability to expose yourself to the uncertainty of reality when you do not use the Internet as a crutch of the ‘me’, as an accomplice in creating a false reality that will be crushed. “
He adds that “the person uses the Internet to meet another person, but mainly to play with this case.” The whole process is just a game with someone you know or would like to meet, but without compromise. After all, the distance through the screen, the illusion of anonymity, the absence of personal contact often work in a liberating way in what we will reveal, what we will show, something that we would rarely do in face-to-face contact and especially from the first date “.
The reasons for the increase in online flirting
“In addition to the obvious answers, which are the prohibition of trafficking and confinement in our homes, it is useful to point out that this crisis has found us at a time when the broader social context has collapsed key points of reference for the community: politics , moral, religious. ” -, with dominant phenomena the culture of consumption, speed, the lack of management of “I am bored” and the need for immediate satisfaction of desires, in the “here and now”.
Social networks do not replace real relationships.
The quarantine highlighted the positive impact of technology in the field of communication, says Vergouli, noting that “social networks and related applications additionally act in real relationships, they do not replace them and their impact on the individual’s mental health is very bigger than we initially thought. On the Internet, we can easily move from the real to the imaginary, and in addition to exploring our sexuality, we can also pave the way for illusion. “
Gradually, the restriction measures are lifted and, little by little, we try to revive as normal as possible, since the crown is here and we are still looking for the weapons to face it effectively.
But we can go out, meet people, flirt and fall in love, without seeking the help of the Internet, not only because “computers don’t talk about love”, but because the Internet has many dangerous twists.
Source: RES-EIA
