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Great movie. Large screen. Loved it. pic.twitter.com/DrAY5tRg5P
– Tom Cruise (@TomCruise) August 25, 2020
Tom Cruise, baby. Just an ordinary Joe! Can be your neighbor as well. Do you need to borrow some eggs? Tom is your husband. Need help getting your cat off a tree? At 5’7 ”Tom is not your man, but he lends you his ladder. Need help navigating the treacherous bridge between OT III: The Wall of Fire and OT IV: Drug Rundown? Tom is definitely your husband.
Why then would we be surprised that he enjoys going to the movies? Everyone loves the movies. You’re in London, it’s a clear day, you’re hauling a black cabin and catching a matinee from Chris Nolan’s highly anticipated thriller Tenet. What could be more normal?
Now, seeing Tom Cruise’s normal civilian things is … surprise. The guy is one of the top three or four most famous, successful people on earth. Everyone knows he spends his days with free-ranging volcanoes and sharks diving with shrimp tied to his balsa bag. That’s why he was seen arriving at the cinema and saying “here we are … back to the movies” was like watching a politician shoot a campaign ad surrounded by a family he rented for the day. You know that something is not right. You know he’s trying shine normal. And then you start asking yourself what is real and what is not.
Did he construct this fake cinema on some alien planet, and transport a bunch of extras while using a SpaceX favor from Elon? Is this a simulation? Even the way he claps before the movie starts sends shivers down my spine.
We know that Tom Cruise has a private cinema – whose sound system and image quality BLOWS what AMC Loews does out of the water – in at least eight of his (ballpark) 12 homes. We know he can get screeners Tenet with a quick text to his agent. So why did he hire a videographer to follow him through the everyday merry-go-round attending a civic cinema?
Do not misunderstand me; I love Tom Cruise. I do not care about his unusual religious beliefs or the fact that he somehow found the source Tuck Everlasting and age not.
But Tom, if you want people to believe you’re just like the rest of us, you’re barking at the wrong tree. I will not buy it. Not for a second. This cinema is not real, that cabin was not real, and all this was just an attempt to divert attention from something wild and strange and unusual. Now it’s up to us to figure that out.
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