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“AIDS brings people a social death rather than physical death” – Susan Sontag, “The metaphor of disease”
Written by: Chen Yi / Video: Luo Zhenghui
The world is filled with an atmosphere of blind fear of AIDS. Some people think that AIDS is transmitted through droplets, so they don’t dare to eat at the same table as infected people; Others think that HIV infection is equivalent to AIDS. What type of disease is AIDS? Why have you covered the mystery for so long? How do infected people fight to survive under the double restrictions of viruses and stigma? Infected youthA Qing(Pseudonym) For the first time in the media, he spoke to Sanli News Net about his voice in the past three years and his confession to his parents.
▲ A Qing, an HIV-infected person, shared her thoughts on fighting AIDS and continued to move forward after changing her life. (Photo / Reporter Chen Yi Photography)
One night in early 2020, we were at the “Kafka by the sea” cafe in the mansion. A Qing recalled the mental journey since HIV diagnosis in May 2016. At that time, A Qing’s body appeared a little, suspected of urinary tract infection, first went to the hospital, the doctor performed a blood test to To see if there were other problems, he once suspected he had gonorrhea.
A few days later, A Qing returned to the hospital after taking the medication. The doctor opened the door and said, “There is a problem with the blood.” He directly stated his HIV diagnosis and asked him not to worry too much. The doctor’s expression was quite calm. “Is this true?” Qing asked, and the doctor replied, “Yes, yes!” According to China’s laws and regulations, once medical personnel find an infected person, they must notify the local health authority within 24 hours.
Another important part of HIV diagnosis is psychological counseling. Soon, a supervisor, a girl, entered, seamlessly connecting Qing to “lead” and taking him to another small room to explain the follow-up arrangement. A Qing said that before the infected person first arrives at the hospital to hear the diagnosis, the doctor will inform the supervisor in advance about the new case, and the supervisor will go to the scene to respond. This is the POE of China’s medical system. Helpless or leave for a moment of panic.
Right now, A Qing’s head didn’t have much trouble, he just asked over and over, “Is this true?” But looking back, I really had an insecure behavior. So this will not be unreasonable, he told himself.
The first supervisor that A Qing met was a friendly nurse. He carefully explained to Qing what treatment methods our country can provide for people infected with HIV at this stage. Qing didn’t worry too much after listening. The other party emphasized that the amount of virus can be suppressed by taking medications. If well controlled, the lifespan of the infected person may be similar to that of the average person, and the quality of life will not be reduced. HIV is already a chronic controllable disease. Although it is better to take the medicine as soon as possible, but because once it is taken, it cannot be stopped. The administrator expects A Qing to carefully evaluate and decide to start taking the medication again.
The manager is more concerned about the psychological state of A Qing, a “newbie”: a young man under 25, suffering from an incurable disease, walks beforehand to the crossroads of life, how to adjust his mood? Is there something to worry about? “I don’t have panic or anxiety right now.” Qing came up with the plan to study abroad due to illness and the mood to leave the hospital on the day of diagnosis. Confusion due to the unknown is more than fear. I had never thought of this before. Something will appear in life, but it really comes.
▲ One Qing used the sound of “Dong” to describe his mental state the day he was diagnosed with HIV. (Photo courtesy of A Qing)
“2016.05.05. HIV positive.『Dong』A cry I don’t know why I wasn’t so anxious right now. I have one more identity as a carrier of AIDS. “On the first day of diagnosis, a simple adverbial expression revealed A Qing’s state of mind. Since then, a new identity has been added, but there is no new joy. Instead, he has to face himself again, face life, and face everything important People. RESET
“I was declared HIV positive two days ago, but I want to live. Until now I can face calmly and many things, but the moment I wanted to tell my mother, I was so sad that I couldn’t think about it anymore.”On May 7, 2016, A Qing wrote this paragraph in his notebook. Soon after her diagnosis, she considered letting some important people around her know the facts, so she made a list. The first thing A Qing thought about was his mother, but he became entangled that if they told only one person, it could cause pressure, so he decided to inform his parents at the same time that the two can support each other and worry about the pressure.
▲ People infected with HIV suffer a lot of internal pain “It is a difficult pain to see”. (Photo courtesy of A Qing)
A Qing specially picked him up the day before he went to see the doctor, and asked his parents to sit in the living room with his back to himself, and he began to say:“In the past, in fact, I had unsafe sex, so I was diagnosed with HIV. But haven’t they found me wrong all along? This means I manage my life very well, they don’t have to worry about me.” “In speaking to reporters about this process, A Qing’s tone was firm and introspective, and his expression was silent. Most people thought that people living with HIV would be tragic, and he couldn’t see it at all.
I finally said what was in my heart, but was concerned that my parents did not understand HIV, and maybe I had some misunderstandings. A Qing took out Dr. Luo Yijun’s book “Heart Valley” to read. Dr. Luo has been studying and paying attention to AIDS for many years. He has also gone to Malawi, an African country, to care for AIDS patients. Her book provides a way for the public to quickly understand AIDS. A Qing told his parents that if they have any questions about HIV, they can discuss it together.
Perhaps just after a thunderstorm, A Qing’s parents were speechless for a while and didn’t respond much. As an elder, you should not be able to understand why a child with good homework and behavior from an early age is infected with “this disease”. On his mother’s face, A Qing saw a mother’s concerns, and her father, who was always struggling to remain silent, might not be in a hurry to stop the car while driving A Qing to the hospital.
A Qing confessed to his parents that the place of consultation is the infection department, which is a regular return visit. He wants to invite them to the clinic to listen to the doctor’s explanation. Through professional explanations, they learned that some people in the world contracted this disease, not due to severe retribution or sentence, but due to temporary neglect, luck or ignorance. Everyone has a chance to fall.
The child became a person infected with HIV. Like countless parents in the world, A Qing’s parents blamed him for not taking care of him. Originally I hoped that I could go abroad to study after completing my studies, and then start a family. Be careful, a virus that is too small to deconstruct a person’s life plan instantly.
▲ A Qing told himself that the disease actually reminded us that something went wrong in our lives. (Photo courtesy of A Qing)
It has been deconstructed and can be rebuilt.
HIV interrupted a Qing’s career plan. He knew that his dream of studying abroad was difficult to achieve. He found a job in the AIDS field. The combination of long-term life and career experience enables you to find a sense of mission and explore social, cultural, and medical knowledge about AIDS through literature tracking, reading, and discussion. Faced with unknown prospects, A Qing did not sit in a sad city. No matter how reluctant, HIV finally became part of life, he had to work hard to see his true face. Even though medicine still doesn’t have a one-size-fits-all solution for this cunning virus, it understands that as long as you cooperate with the doctor’s advice, take medication regularly, and maintain good lifestyle habits, you can still suppress the amount of virus toU = U“(Undetectable = not contagious).
HIV is an ancient “retrovirus”, only a thousandth the size of human hair, but its process of invading the human body is like inferiority.Hot(Nathalia Holt) vividly described this in “Victory over AIDS”: the virus first contacts T cells (a type of human lymphocyte that play a key role in the immune system), releasing its own enzymes and RNA to the T In the cell, use its own enzyme, reverse transcriptase, to transcribe its RNA into DNA and advance in the nucleus; then use chimeric enzymes to cut our DNA, cut the chromosome, and connect with the newly generated viral DNA; When cells transcribe viral DNA into RNA, our cells will make viral proteins according to the virus “instructions”; proteases will then combine these proteins into one virus. When the virus leaves the cell, it will obtain proteins from the human cell membrane, allowing it to obtain the “key” to unlock more T cells.
The above invasion process may sound tortuous. In short, HIV uses a “dark Chencang crossover” trick to bind to and the host genome, and the human immune system cannot determine whether it is a viral gene or not. Own genes. Every time the host cells replicate, the virus also replicates.
It’s hard to imagine that HIV, most likely derived from African chimpanzees, can produce such a carefully crafted science fiction conspiracy, a virus that looks like a sea urchin under an electron microscope and can replicate billions of times a day. HIV has left a huge and fundamental footprint in humans, and has been on our chromosomes ever since, and only a handful of viruses in the world can do this:Invade our essential area.
A powerful virus does not kill people immediately. HIV was not a complete T-cell killer at first. If it’s a killer virus, the host will die soon, but there’s no chance of infecting more people. It is more like a Trojan horse. If the human body is a room, then HIV appears to be someone who walks through an empty door, but instead of stealing things, they choose to cover up, pretend to be silent, do wrong things, and paralyze the entire alarm system. Sometimes HIV will live in the human body for several years, and some infected people may not be aware of it. During this period, it can be transmitted to others through the blood, body fluids (mainly unprotected sex), and vertical mother and child infections.
▲ As long as people infected with HIV take medications to suppress the amount of virus, they can maintain immunity that is no different from that of ordinary people and will not progress to the stage of AIDS. (Photo / Pixabay)
Qing emphasized:HIV infection does not mean suffering from “AIDS”. Because HIV can integrate into the DNA of human cells, its “disguised” nature can prevent our immune system from reacting. Usually in the later stages of the disease, along with lack of drug control and low immunity, HIV begins to replicate wildly and kills immune cells. When the specialized defense system gradually loses its defense, it is unable to resist various bacteria, viruses, and fungi. Opportunistic infections (such as oral esophageal candidiasis, tuberculosis, pneumocystis pneumonia, Kaposi’s sarcoma, cryptococcal meningitis, etc.) will progress to AIDS.
Thanks to medical science and technology, people living with HIV (including Aqing) living in developed countries do not have to fight the disease like their predecessors. In the past, the impressions of most infected people remained in Kaposi’s sarcoma, pneumocystis pneumonia, thin body, sunken cheeks, fat displacement, etc. After years of new treatment methods, infected people can take the medications on time. Keep the virus volume low. Although the virus in the body cannot be completely eliminated, the remaining virus will withdraw to deep organs such as the lymph nodes and enter a dormant state, temporarily unable to cause chaos.
Just as our interview was conducted until 9pm, the alarm on A Qing’s mobile phone went off. It was time for him to take medicine every day.
A Qing took out a small pill, which is currently one of the first-line AIDS drugs. People taking this drug are said to be less likely to develop resistance to HIV quickly. Take one pill a day. Each person infected with HIV takes different medications. The choice is now A Qing’s decision after speaking with the doctor. The side effects on it are relatively small. In fact, AIDS medications have not been as easy to eat in the past, and the onset of side effects can be more painful than the disease itself.
One Qing said that at the beginning of the advent of AIDS drugs, infected people had to eat a dozen or twenty pills at a time, several times a day. The effectiveness of the drugs in the early years was not as good as the current new drugs. Many patients must set alarm clocks to remind themselves. In the middle of the night, I still have to get up and take medicine. In addition to the idea of taking medications all day, diarrhea, fat shifting, and other side effects also seriously interfere with the quality of life and skin appearance of early infected people, and even people with good eyes can acknowledge that they receive AIDS treatment.
Among people infected with HIV, there is a group of people with special genes called “extraordinary drivers.” Most people infected with HIV will have many T cells, but “extraordinary controller” T cells can survive and kill. Some viruses die. However, if it is a generally infected person, lacks innate talents, the drug cannot be avoided, once the drug is discontinued, the body has no drugs to help suppress the virus, I’m afraid HIV you will have a large fan on your body. A Qing is looking forward to future treatments that can be taken in a simpler and more convenient way. For example, injection treatment can give a single injection without taking medicine for a month; In the future, there may be a subcutaneous chip that can slowly implant itself in the body of an infected person. The medicine is released without taking medicine for a year.
Has anyone successfully cured AIDS?The answer is yes! In 2008, Timothy Ray Brown, the Berlin patient, attracted worldwide attention, and the HIV-infected person with blood cancer miraculously recovered after receiving a bone marrow transplant from a special donor. The reason is not difficult to understand. The bone marrow contains stem cells. Stem cells become mature blood cells necessary for blood. In addition to producing red blood cells, the bone marrow also produces white blood cells, which make up the body’s immune system. Most strains of the HIV virus use the CCR5 receptor on the surface of immune cells to infect humans. CCR5 can be said to be a key springboard for human HIV infection. However, if a new stem cell transplant is accepted, blood will be injected with a new immunity. The cells and the “Berlin patient” were in harmony with each other. Her donor had a mutated gene and was wearing a faulty CCR5 receptor, preventing her from producing the CCR5 protein after receiving a bone marrow transplant. Without the trampoline, HIV can only kick the iron plate.
HIV has not been detected in the blood of “Berlin patients,” and cerebrospinal fluid, lymph tissues, and gastrointestinal tissues have not been found by close inspection. It has become the world’s first truly AIDS process. Full of coincidence and luck: genetically unique bone marrow donors plus successful bone marrow transplants. Like Zhang Wuji in a martial arts novel, he accidentally rescued a white ape and obtained the “Nine Yang Zhen Jing” from its belly. They are expelled. However, the vast majority of people infected with HIV do not have Zhang Wuji’s good luck.
The fight against AIDS is a lifelong battle. A Qing revealed that many patients around them tend to leave the disease in the hospital, that is, regular visits, taking medications, taking medications and other times they choose to forget, for them, exploring The illness seems to keep reminding me “I am sick”. For A Qing, he understands why he is sick, so he doesn’t have too many faults or complaints: “People are used to horrifying the disease. In fact, the disease reminds us that life may need to be adjusted.”
▲ “This battle against AIDS is not, and should never be, a war between people. It should be a war between people and viruses.” Movie star Elizabeth Taylor’s comments influenced Aqing. (Photo / Reporter Chen Yi Photography)
“When people survive, the problem arises.”
When a person infected with HIV deliberately spreads the disease to others, it is their personality, not all people infected with HIV, that is the problem. In the 19th century, people believed that cholera was a punishment for ignoring health regulations and a curse for the unclean, depraved, and promiscuous; In the 21st century, there are people who see AIDS the same way. Well-known late American critic Susan Sontag believes others consider the AIDS infection to be guilty, and its route of transmission, the reversal of sexual indulgence, has also been severely accused.
A cancer patient positively confronts his rebellious cells, and the outside world will give him a reputation as a “cancer fighter”; When someone contracts HIV, the outside world will use the “Chinese dart” to describe, they become a person infected with AIDS, a carrier of AIDS. Even if he struggles to survive, no one will call him an AIDS fighter.
AIDS is a disease that has been demonized for a long time, and the impact on trust between people is as serious as the damage of the virus to health. Dr. Luo Yijun’s “Heart Valley” made A Qing understand that HIV is vilified, stigmatized, and misunderstood. This is related to the connection between AIDS and specific ethnic groups, drug addicts and sex workers in the past. Even now, the media reports on incidents related to more negative metaphors, and the group of infected people suffers from ponds. A Qing believes that there is a story behind each infected person, and this is more important than exploring how they became infected.
Dr. Luo Yijun reminded A Qing between the lines, there is still a group of people in this society who continue to care for people living with HIV. Every time A Qing heard that public figures described HIV as condemnation and retribution, he wondered: how many people in society wear colored glasses to treat AIDS patients? Social prejudice cannot be changed overnight and “recognizing AIDS” has become a matter of urgency forever, because everyone has a chance.
The World Health Organization (WHO) announced in 1980 to eliminate smallpox from terror, but the joy of defeating the virus did not last long. Latent AIDS is like thunder in the United States. The source and spread of the virus is unknown, but the majority of infected people are Gay men, the stigma of the “cancer buddy” spreads widely, and even former President Reagan’s spokesman publicly derided AIDS as “the gay plague ” Until Haitian immigrants, women, children, and hemophiliacs developed similar illnesses, the public slowly realized that HIV is not unique to homosexuality.
In 1991, the American NBA star Magic Johnson publicly admitted that it was an HIV infection:“Many people think that only homosexuals can get HIV and they don’t do their thing. I use my own example to tell them that Magic Johnson can get HIV and that this disease can affect anyone.”
A Qing kept thinking about what happened to him and led to the advent of HIV. He reexamined the unexpected bits of his life: “I should calm down and think about the way forward, think about how to accomplish what I want to do with limited options.” Stuff. Life is limited, and some things must be done first. “Some infected people consider HIV to be a kind of salvation, because these people start to reorganize after getting sick, they try to control the disease, they increase the amount of exercise, they control themselves regularly and his physical and mental conditions go beyond infection. The old I. Physiologically, HIV reminds A Qing to pay more attention to his health, psychologically, HIV prompts him to reflect on his life. To be optimistic HIV is a blessing to urge a weight loss lifestyle, but no one should ignore the fact that the virus is bad.
“This battle against AIDS is not and should never be a war between people. It should be a war between people and viruses.”Legendary star Elizabeth Taylor vowed to fight AIDS during her lifetime, and her words became A Qing’s belief. As life took a turn in 2016, he simply dedicated himself to working in the AIDS field and cared for the same people and other vulnerable groups with his own experience. He has no time to hurt spring and fall, and another door to his life has opened. For this human-virus war, he still has a lot of things he wants to do. You don’t think you can do anything because of illness, even if there are some companies’ physical examination standards not related to work ability.
After confessing everything to his parents, A Qing discovered that they had actually seen Dr. Luo’s “Valley of Hearts”, and the book had obvious signs of turning around. Parents and children began to discuss knowledge of the disease, and parents took the initiative to worry about their physical condition and diet. The medicine is gone, how the work is going, and he often takes her to the hospital. The uninformed sister also asked, “You have visited so many infected people, will you become infected?” He never tires of bothering to teach his family, HIV cannot be transmitted through drops, but through blood, semen and other intermediaries, even if some of the couples are infected or can still give birth to healthy babies with medical assistance.
In the movie “The Confession”, there is an impressive bridge. High school teacher Yoko Moriguchi, played by actress Matsuri Ryoko, claimed to mix the blood of people infected with HIV into the students’ milk, causing uproar and Panic, the student who drank the milk felt he was infected like a bird. scary. It wasn’t until the end that he confessed to the students that he didn’t do it at all. Even if you actually drank the fresh milk mixed with the blood of people infected with HIV, the chance of infection was almost nil. There is no such common sense. “Although it is a plot of a film, it faithfully reflects a lack of understanding by the general public and fear of AIDS.
One of A Qing’s jobs is to provide consulting services to answer all kinds of people’s questions. For example, someone called once: “I was walking on the road, and a passerby spoke loudly and my mouth spat into my eyes.” Is it possible to get HIV? “” I went to the motel and saw a used condom on the floor. I picked it up directly with my hands and the sperm fell onto my skin. Will this get infected? “There is also a middle-aged adult. People believe that HIV is transmitted through droplets. Faced with a variety of problems, A Qing has to patiently respond one by one, and continue health education.
A Qing said that when science has already shown that the virus will not choose people, there is no goal in continuing to connect AIDS with certain social groups. So far, I have heard relevant comments from public figures or social groups from time to time. Suspicious, but not conducive to the prevention and treatment of infectious diseases. “There are no dangerous groups, only high-risk behaviors!” A Qing looked back and thought he was thoughtless and did not fulfill his obligation to protect himself. Later, he couldn’t help but complain about how he couldn’t possess the relevant knowledge early.
There are currently more than 32,000 people infected with HIV in Taiwan, which means that there will be one person infected with an average of more than 700 people. A Qing emphasized that they can be by your side, perhaps colleagues who talk and laugh with you every day, or friends who accompany you for a drink, take your bitter water when you are sad or even loved ones who live under the same roof . Maybe they choose to hide the secret deep in their hearts, but if someone is ever willing to open the door for us, A Qing hopes you won’t forget the one you admire and value because he’s infected. The virus will not change your personality. It remains the original: “The infected person is also a person, not a virus.”
▲ The person infected with HIV can be by his side. A Qing urged not to let HIV be all you know about him, and don’t forget the one he admired because the other person was infected with HIV. (Photo / Reporter Chen Yi Photography)
◆ U = U 【Undetectable = Not transmissible】
In other words, “undetectable = not contagious”. The World Health Organization, the United Nations AIDS Program and the International AIDS Society said that according to the latest research, an HIV-infected person receiving stable antiviral therapy will suppress the amount of virus in the blood in a been undetectable for more than 6 months. The risk of spreading HIV through sex is negligible or non-existent.
