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There are 17,717 graves in Östra kyrkogården in Gothenburg. A headstone that attracts a little more attention is one with four names and two quotation marks engraved in a typeface. After the last name it says “What did I say?”
Sofia Jansson, who is one of the daughters of Dan Jansson, owner of the stone, tells what is really hidden behind the expression.
– This quote is about humor and irony. It’s like wanting to show that “this is where I ended up, after all,” he says.
Sofia Jansson also says that humor certainly helped her father get through the darkest moments.
– I think black humor probably saved him many times. It’s also a humor that gets us through tough times even today, he says.
READ MORE: Photograph headstones and contribute to genealogy
“It drives wonderfully”
Sofia Jansson also talks about another expression on the tombstone:
– Dad worked as a truck driver for many years and always when we said goodbye he would say “drive beautifully” as a concern to take care of us.
She says that people passing by sometimes asked about the tombstone quotes. So they have often guessed that Dan Jansson was killed in a car accident based on the quote “He drives wonderfully.” But it was diabetes along with alcohol abuse that took last.
They celebrated their last birthday together. “We light one on the same day and it has always been special too. We always called and sang for each other at the same time, which was very welcoming. I miss that too, “says Sofia Jansson. Photo: Private
“Important not to glorify death”
Sofia says that they often talk about their father in everyday conversations. Noel, Sofia’s son, was three months old when her grandfather passed away.
– In order for Noel to take a picture of his grandfather, we talked a lot about him, what he did and what he liked and the music he liked. Now that “Show must go on” is playing on the radio, Noel always says: “Mom, now comes Grandpa’s song,” he says.
On the other hand, Sofia also believes that one should never glorify oneself when a person dies. It’s a fine line between memory and denial. She says her father had a drinking problem for much of his life.
However, he affirms that they have many very good memories with his father and that despite the declines, he always improves.
– There are always two sides of the coin and you choose which side you want to see. You have to learn from it and I think my family is great at making things better, he says.
Cinnamon bun day is your day
The other day, Sofia Jansson’s family and brothers Carl-Emil and Carin were in Östra kyrkogården for coffee. They usually do it often enough to hang out and remember together. They brought coffee and cinnamon buns. It was his dad’s favorite cupcake.
– We usually get ready and snuggle up when we’re there. Actually, it’s a bit ironic; Dad died on the day of the cinnamon roll. So on October 4 of each year we gather here and eat cinnamon buns – it has become our day. I think it’s very nice, he says.
What do you miss most about your dad?
– The conversation. Spontaneous conversations. Especially when you were going out and going somewhere. Dad kept a close eye on strawberry places in Sweden and always had good advice on where to go wherever we went. And your life experience. I miss his laugh and his humor. Have my dad there.
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