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Four young people about growing up in Djursholm
Of: Helena Trus, Natalia Kazmierska
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Status in Djursholm is not just about money and space, but also about coming from the “right” family.
Young people from the affluent area talk about gossip, prejudice and why they hug each other for their whole lives.
– There are mines everywhere here. One mistake is enough. If you disagree with one person, you will have a whole group against you, says 19-year-old Ebba.
They grew up in one of Sweden’s most affluent suburbs, an area of just over 9,000 inhabitants in the Danderyd municipality, north of Stockholm, where some of the country’s wealthiest have lived for generations.
A year has passed since the Netflix series “Biggest of all” gave rise to column metrics on “reality Djursholm” and the upper class. In the series, the high life of the youth was painted with drug abuse, mindless house parties, and luxury yachts. But also with mental illnesses among adolescents neglected by the adult world.
To some extent, the media image of Djursholm is correct, say the young people we spoke to. But they also point to prejudice.
– When I saw “The Greatest of All” I thought it was pretty absurd, should it be Djursholm? Is this what people think of our society? We may not have realized it was like this before, he says. Alice, 16, who grew up here and attends the prestigious Viktor Rydbergs gym, a school that has one of the highest admission points in the country.
Photo: MAGNUS WENNMAN
“When you say you are from Djursholm, you are immediately faced with prejudices that are not fair. You are trapped on a hill, like we are high class, nose in the air, overweight, stretched out, we have it so easy for us. That Djursholm is flawless, ”says Ebba.
Photo: Magnus Wennman
Högstadieskolan Viktor Rydbergs samskola Djursholm is a free school that is open to all applicants, regardless of the municipality in which you live. If the number of applicants exceeds the number of places, admission is made according to the principle of proximity.
Like Alice, Emma and Ebba, 19, grew up in Djursholm.
– Most have lived here for generations, but not my family who moved here when I was two. For someone who does not come from a family in Djursholm, it can be difficult. Because it gives status. I had a hard time adjusting and others at school told me I didn’t fit in, I didn’t have the right clothes, or I was going to the right destination on vacation, says Emma.
Ebba has attended schools in Djursholm since childhood and belongs to the third generation of Djursholmers on the father’s side of the family.
– When you say that you are from Djursholm, you immediately face prejudices that are not fair. You are trapped on a hill, like we are high class, nose in the air, overweight, stretched out, we have it so easy for us. That Djursholm is flawless, says Ebba.
“Must be born in Djursholm”
19-year-old Elin, unlike the others, grew up not in Djursholm but in Åkersberga, but chose to go to the Danderyds gym.
According to her, you can clearly see who “real animal islanders” are.
– There is a difference in how they dress, separately. It is difficult to point out, it shows in their way of walking, talking, that they have grown up and formed socially since they were born. Something that is difficult to learn for the rest of us who come from abroad. It’s nothing you have to or can work for, you’re born with that.
Photo: MAGNUS WENNMAN
19-year-old Emma on the importance of class affiliation in Djursholm: “It’s important, but it can misrepresent Djursholm when it says you can only fit in if you’re rich. It is possible to live here even if you do not belong to the inner circle ”.
Gossip Girl gossip accounts
Emma, 19, describes that she had a difficult education, especially in the seventh grade at Viktor Rydberg’s joint school in Djursholm, one of Stockholm’s most prestigious secondary schools.
She quickly noticed that she didn’t fit in and was harassed on anonymous online forums. On Instagram accounts with names like “Gossip VR” or “Danderyd gossip”, inspired by the television series “Gossip girl”, rumors and gossip spread. 14-year-old girls could be called whores and have nude photos posted.
– It was written that you had ugly clothes, that you weren’t pretty enough, that no boy wanted one, that you weren’t invited to parties, says Emma.
She feels there was a clear hierarchy in the school. Some days she felt so vulnerable that she didn’t even want to go there. The teachers did not see what was happening, or they closed their eyes.
– The children with rich parents that I experienced leaned toward their parents having a lot of power. It often happened that they dared not do anything to get the teachers to take their side. I know parents who kept quiet and looked down on what their children did, says Emma.
“We hug from behind”
One day the gout came, as Emma herself describes it. A student spat at him in the school hallway. But this time she said no. On the same day, Emma is said to have received a text message from the student’s father, scolding her for not behaving as she should in a “sophisticated society” like Djursholm.
– It felt threatening. Hen pointed to his authority and power in the township and felt uncomfortable. So I decided to ignore the situation, it was a battle I couldn’t have won. Then the student continued to harass me throughout high school.
Amanda Hurst, director of schools for the Viktor Rydberg Foundation, cannot comment on individual cases. “But at the same time, I can say that in our own student surveys that we do regularly, we see that students experience a sense of security and that you feel comfortable in your school. It is very important for us. All students and tutors are treated equally, “he wrote in an email.
Photo: MAGNUS WENNMAN
Ebba grew up in Djursholm and attended Viktor Rydberg’s joint school, Djursholm, which is a free school. However, if a student is applying for an English major or a music profile, the school uses tests and tests allowed by the National Agency for Education as a condition for admission or for student selection.
The young people we have spoken to want to remain anonymous in order to speak openly. Or like Ebba, 19, describes it, without breaking the loyalty that has been kept since childhood.
– It is a special bond between those of us who come from Djursholm, we are soldiers. Even if not everyone likes or agrees, we will always stay away for life. It is enough with a mistake, that you disagree with one person and have a whole group against you. There are mines everywhere here, it’s about tripping over your toes.
She continues:
– There are two types of Djursholmers, those who were born here and those who try to become Djursholmers. Those who come from here do not have to prove themselves, it means that we automatically end up at the top of the hierarchy. My family has lived here for so long that we don’t have to prove anything. I know where I come from and maybe I radiate that too.
Is it important to maintain the network of contacts in Djursholm?
– I know that we, even the people I do not like and who do not like me, will meet in work life and then we will help each other. I will definitely take advantage of it. It may seem like a cult, and maybe it’s a bit like that.
Status to organize a party at home
Ebba herself says she’s been lucky growing up. With a mother who was at home a lot and who made sure her father was not absent too much.
– Many children here grow up with au pairs and babysitters and are alone writing all year long. They lose the feeling of a united family. Those who have a bad relationship with their parents easily become rebellious, making up a lot of mischief when sitting alone in a big empty house, he says.
From 14 to 15 years old, the state is to have a party at home or to be invited to it. Hundreds of people can come to the parties, even from other pleasant areas like Lidingö, and there are large amounts of alcohol, sometimes drugs. Ebba describes it as an abundance.
– There are so many amazing young people here, but still they do such stupid things as abuse, says Ebba.
The latest Stockholm poll showed that many young people from Danderyd use so-called party drugs. What do you think the drug is due to?
– I think it’s usually due to mental illness. Outwardly, they can show off a nice facade. But what is the most important thing: the parents’ money or their love?
Photo: MAGNUS WENNMAN
Aftonbladet reporter Helena Trus meets two of the girls in Djursholm to talk about what it’s like to grow up and go to school here.
“Will to succeed”
Alice, 16, for her part, believes that the notion that all young people are arrogant and take drugs is greatly exaggerated. Of course there is a lot of parties, but many times parents are aware of what is happening, they can even be at home while the children have a party. She thinks Djursholm is a safe place to grow up, with many successful adult models.
– Young people who feel the pressure to get good grades in high school often have already planned their whole lives, they know what school they want to get into and what it takes to get there. You see that you can be very good if you work hard. For me, it’s more of a desire to be successful, as well as the people around him, he says.
She dreams of becoming a lawyer and traveling the world herself, but she can imagine settling down in Djursholm when it’s time to start a family.
– Here is a good education and, for example, the Djursholm tennis club, where you have played ball and played all your life. These are the same people who have always worked at the grocery store, my brothers had the same teacher at school as me. In a way, it’s a pretty tight and small community. At the same time, people are not so critical. But you may not share almost everything, people here are pretty private.
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