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On Christmas Day last year, the tragic news came that Ari Behn was dead. He was only 47 years old and took his own life. The death left the country’s population in shock, and the survivors and their families in indescribable pain.
Honored Ari with a moving speech
Following his death, he flowed with condolences and tributes to the deceased artist, and among those who shared some touching words about Behn was his girlfriend Ebba Rysst Heilmann (35).
«You, the most fragile, the most beautiful, the strongest, the most complex human being. I am always with you, my beloved Ari. And I know that you will be with me for the rest of my life and you will look at me and cheer until we meet again. I know you took care of me until the end ”, was among what he wrote in an Instagram post that contained a photo of the two together.
Now, nine months later, she opens up about the grief and daily life after Ari Behn’s death. She does this in an interview with A.
Do you need someone to talk to?
- Acute suicide risk: 113
- Emergencies: 116117
- Mental Health Helpline: 116123, sidetmedord.no
- Kirkens SOS phone: 22400040, kirkens-sos.no
I had a lot on my mind
Heilmann candidly recounts one of the last text messages she received from her boyfriend. Behn’s message came just a few weeks before Christmas last year.
The text message contained a declaration of love filled with hope and faith for the future that a good life awaited them and that everything would be fine.
But then came the shocking news that Ari had passed away. In the interview, Heilmann recalls the last time she saw her boyfriend, before he was buried in Oslo Cathedral on January 3.
Saying goodbye to Behn describes Heilmann as horrible, but also nice. She doesn’t hide the fact that she had many things on her mind and many things she wanted to tell Behn.
– The darkness took him. It hurts so much
– I told him how important he was to me and how much I loved him, he tells the magazine.
When he drove home from the chapel and looked up at the sky over Torshovdalen, Heilmann says he had never seen a more beautiful winter sky.
– I think it was him, and I still do. He is the one who made me dare to do this interview. Because that’s what he did: he empowered people, he adds.
Wants to help others
Nine months later, the pain for Ari Behn remains great, but Heilmann struggles to find what she describes as meaning in the nonsensical.
The lump in your breast is still present and you have no idea how long it will be before it disappears.
Heilmann tells Dagbladet that it feels scary, correct, and very important to be open about pain.
– We are all in deep pain and pain
– Everything that can help prevent suicide and understanding suicide is very important to me, and I think it is very important to many. I think more stories that emerge about this will contribute to greater understanding and knowledge, he says, adding:
– Now suddenly I have a voice that I want to use to help others. And also give a voice to the many survivors and family members who are and have been in the same situation as me.
Heilmann was at Christmas dinner with the family when he received the news of her boyfriend’s death. It was Behn’s father, Olav Bjørshol (68), who told Heilmann the tragic news that left her stunned.
I found the son
It was Bjørshol who found his son dead. He appeared in an issue of See and Hear in mid-January, where Bjørshol and his wife, Marianne Behn (66), opened up about their son’s death for the first time.
In the interview, Behn’s father went into more detail about Ari Behn’s last day. He was visiting his son’s home in Lommedalen on both Christmas Eve and the first day of Christmas.
– I was the one who found it. Today I am very grateful to be with him, Bjørshol told Se og Hør.
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Originally, Behn was supposed to have celebrated Christmas Eve as a guest of the royal couple with his three daughters Maud Angelica (17), Leah Isadora (15) and Emma Tallulah (12) in Kongsseteren, but had to cancel.
Behn felt very bad to participate, so plans were changed for him to travel to Larkollen to celebrate Christmas with his parents. This plan never materialized either, so Bjørshol decided to travel early with her son on Christmas Eve.
Moren: – Ari had ME
– Ari was not alone when he decided to end his life. It seemed as if Ari had found some kind of peace on the last day, he continued.
Behn’s family has always chosen to be open about the son who took his own life, something for which they have received a lot of praise, especially for putting an additional focus on mental health.
Got his last resting place
This week, Ari Behn received his last resting place, the same day he should have turned 48. In April, Se og Hør received confirmation from the Funeral Service in the municipality of Oslo that Ari Behn was to be buried in field 020 of the Our Savior Cemetery.
You don’t care about Ari’s life
The artist and author would thus have his final resting place a few meters from great Norwegians such as Bjørnstjerne Bjørnson, Henrik Ibsen and Edvard Munch. On Wednesday, the headstone was in place.
– I can confirm that today there has been a reduction of polls for Ari. It is no accident that today’s date is chosen. It was a private urn reduction with those closest to them present, Geir Håkonsund, a spokesman for the Behn family, told Dagbladet.
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Dagbladet met Ari Behn’s old friend, photographer Per Heimly (48), at the headstone on Wednesday night, right next to Æreslunden in Vår Frelsers Gravlund with Henrik Ibsen as his closest neighbor.
– This is a good place to rest, Ari and several of us have had many good times here from the 1990s onwards, Heimly told Dagbladet.
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Heimly did not know when the urn would be placed with his close friend before Ari Behn’s brother called him on the same day it would happen on his birthday.
– We passed by here just on the way from the city, and had a good time. Ari circled Henrik Ibsen’s grave a lot, and I remember kissing Edvard Munch’s grave, Heimly continued with a smile.
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