Volunteering helped Saúl through a difficult stage of his life; what he experienced surprised even the 30-year-old mother who cared for her mother.

According to Saulius, long-term communication with a sick mother developed the ability to communicate with people experiencing severe crises, formed great empathy (the ability to experience and understand another person’s thoughts, feelings, and conditions). Those who don’t have the skills and experience to communicate with seriously ill people sometimes don’t feel it and such a lazy saying “well, everything will be fine!” It often causes a negative reaction from the latter.
However, listening carefully to the patient’s words, cultivating the thoughts of hope he expresses, usually helps a lot, strengthens his belief that things can really improve.

A friend with cancer

According to Saulius, he had a lot of communication with his friend Ramūnas, who had cancer. They met until the last days of Ramūnas’ life.
“After Ramūnas left for Anapilin, we invited his wife to dinner,” recalls Saúl. “During that dinner, she asked me, ‘How, Saul, did you get along so well with Ramune?’ I was surprised ‘, he usually communicated … And why do you ask?’
Ramūnas’s wife told me that it was very difficult for Ramūnas to communicate in the last years of his life, and conflicts often arose with many of his friends who came to visit him.
“But meeting you was an exception for him,” Ramūnas’ wife said to Saul. “After them he was like on the wings … what did you tell him that?”
The ability to communicate with Ramune and inspire him with hope and a desire for life was precisely his mother’s gift.

“I don’t know who is familiar with multiple sclerosis, but it is a serious disease that gradually spreads throughout the body and damages many organs,” Saulius told the media.

According to the man, his help to his mother was small at first, but over time he needed it more and more.
“In the long run, it was necessary to not only tell my mother about the events at school, but also feed her,” he says. – By interacting with that person, you naturally acquire certain skills of deeper understanding, greater compassion, you see how they lack communication and the opportunity to share. Learn to discover ways to brighten your mood, understand what makes you feel better … “

Patients must integrate into society.

“Few people understand how important it is for the patient to be able to integrate into society,” shares Saulius. “Integration is very important to him, not only psychologically, but also for many other reasons.”

According to Saul, two main things must be understood. The first is that a seriously ill person, of course, will not be 100 percent. able to live fully. But at the same time, in no way can he be allowed to distance himself from society, to shut himself up.

Why is this important?

“There really is a lot of compassion in Lithuanian society,” Saulius shares his thoughts. “I know because I saw it myself.” According to the man, he had to attend the Multiple Sclerosis Society congresses more than once, bringing together many people with different backgrounds.

Saulius saw how successful patient self-help groups work in society, how strongly they are linked by common activities, common interests, and how patients engage in communication that suits them.
“A completely different life is simmering in these mutual aid groups,” says Saulius. – Its concept is very simple. Everyone interacts with the same as him. There are those for whom the disease is beginning and those who are already severely disabled … But everyone can find a suitable communication partner and realize the best within the limits possible for them. To support another, to share experiences … “

The seriously ill can help the healthy.

“We should not think that seriously ill or disabled people can only accept help,” shares Saul. “They can give a lot to each of us.”
According to Saúl, after the death of his mother, he visited a social worker who helped care for his mother, and his memories made him very excited.

“Your mother gave me a lot,” he said. – I have not seen such a positive person … Although we all have healthy hands and feet, family, friends, we still find something to complain about and help to help … And your mother, who is lying in bed for thirty years, not only did he not complain to anyone, but he also supported me morally a lot … “

“However, I myself have experienced that people with one or another serious illness or disability often have unique characteristics, they see the world differently. And their values ​​are different, often exactly what we lack …”

According to Saul, people with disabilities should not be afraid to go out into society with the skills and values ​​they acquired while they had a disability while lying in bed.

“If you dare to appear who you are, you will always find like-minded people,” says the man. – And you will find something to say, and you will have topics to talk. Just realize that while lying in bed, you developed extraordinary abilities. As death approaches, the values ​​are tremendously refined, and these are the treasures you could give your circle of like-minded people or even society at large … “

The cult of youth and beauty.

According to Saul, it is sometimes difficult for us to notice the wisdom of these other people for other reasons as well. One of them is the predominant cult of youth and beauty in society. Beautiful actors, beautiful hosts, beautiful people who appear on television.

Society seems to be saying: look how beautiful we are and how beautiful we live! Be like us! What if you are not beautiful? And don’t you live in a beautiful house? What if you are sick? Are you less valuable?
Just as entrepreneurs brainstorm and thus expand their activities, just as children attend different classes in schools and learn different skills, people with disabilities or the seriously ill get their own unique experiences that can help others. .

The exchange of experiences between people from different destinations is always extremely valuable. Those people nailed to bed really know a lot, have experienced it and can tell us. Or simply to testify that even though we sometimes no longer see the point in the flow of daily life, we must stop, look around and see what a wonderful and unique life we ​​have received.

According to Saulius, the experience gained in caring for his mother helped him a lot in his work in the field of tourism, and he tries to transmit the acquired values ​​to his children.

Volunteer with Maltese

“I came as a volunteer for the Maltese during a difficult period of my life,” says Saulius. “My mother went to Anapilin in February, I had a difficult stage in my professional career … I thought I needed to see everything from a different angle, to get a new experience.” According to Saul, what he saw in the Maltese surprised him.

“I knew that volunteering is a different activity, little known to me, but what I saw surprised me,” shares Saul. – It was completely different from what I was used to. I felt a completely different atmosphere in the Maltese, a completely different “urge”, I recovered a lot. It is an extraordinary feeling to work with people who care about the same as you. There, without words, everyone understands and supports each other. I think many people in the business world should volunteer to translate at least some of those values ​​into their business. “

The man was also very fond of the lonely people of Vilnius, whom he transported soup for some time. “I understand that we don’t appreciate elderly, lonely and disabled people. We don’t take what they can give,” says Saúl. – Being a volunteer and coming to those people was a lot of fun and an honor for me. Each one of them was different, but interesting in their own way, with their unique life experience… I am very happy to have the opportunity to touch their lives, even if it is to help them a little ”.