These statistics are not gratifying: he said that Lithuania ranks highest in Europe in terms of the number of single parents.

Research on the well-being of parents after divorce is still new and not much, according to the press release. “Researchers have been investigating the negative effects of divorce on the well-being of mothers and children for many years, but a whole new generation of research is paying attention to the consequences of divorce for men as fathers,” says a professor of VMU.

25 percent children live with only one parent

More than half (54%) of couples who divorced in Lithuania last year had minor children in common who remained living with one of their parents after the divorce, mainly with their mother.

Single-parent families in Lithuania account for 25 percent. of all households with children, and this number grows every year, according to the statistical office of the European Union. The EU average is 14%, while Lithuania is second only to Estonia (28%) and Denmark (29%).

Continuing the relationship with the child after divorce is good for the health and well-being of men.

According to A. Maslauskaitė, such statistics are cause for concern, because the breakdown of the couple’s relationship affects the father’s participation in raising the child, but it is very important to maintain it.

“Studies from many countries show that the continuity of parent-child relationships after divorce has a positive impact not only on children, their emotional state and academic achievement, but also on the psychological and physical health and social well-being of children. parents “, emphasizes A. Maslauskaitė.

Men who pay alimony regularly feel better

Dr. The results of a study carried out by A. Maslauskaitė and his colleague in Lithuania on the emotional health of single parents showed that parents who maintain good relationships with their children and pay alimony regularly feel greater satisfaction with life than those who do not contribute to child support.
This is also positively influenced by the father’s education: the higher the education, the better the well-being of men.

Men who establish new relationships after divorce are also happier, but fathers living apart from their children are even more likely to experience depressed moods and depression.

The same reasons: before and after the divorce.

According to A. Maslauskaitė, all aspects of life mentioned are closely related, because education provides the opportunity to get a better job and play the role of breadwinner.

“Satisfaction with life and the quality of relationships with the children of parents who live separately from their children ultimately depend on compliance with traditional norms of masculinity, since the continuity of relationships with a child after divorce is mainly related to the obligation to support the child financially. If it doesn’t exist, the relationship is often spotty, not what it should be, and it goes back to dad himself. In the job market, we have several low-paying positions, and some parents are very financially vulnerable. Even if they want to continue the relationship with the children, they may not have much to pay for child support. By not being able to support the children, the parents immediately isolate themselves and their participation in the upbringing of the child is much less ”, explains the sociologist A. Maslauskaitė.

It turns out that the same factors often become the cause of a divorce or a breakup of the couple.

“When they occupy ever lower positions, men cannot live up to their expectations and, as a result, they are stressed. Pressure to comply with social norms can become a pretext to use violence or push towards addictions. The psychosocial stress that men experience also determines certain antisocial behaviors, such as excessive alcohol consumption, which occurs before divorce and then affects them as well, ”says sociologist A. Maskauskaitė, who interviewed 1,225 parents with minor children (25- 54 m.) Who began to live separately from the children after the couple separated.

Changes must take place at both regulatory and legal level

According to A. Maslauskaitė, all possible efforts must be made to preserve the continuity of the parent-child relationship, but for this, changes must occur both at the level of public attitudes and at the legal level.

“In order for parents to continue their relationship with their children after the breakup of society, we must also talk about the legal regulation of this relationship. A person can often fail to overcome that legal system that may have turned against them. The main task is to try to continue the relationship with the child in all possible ways ”, emphasizes A. Maslauskaitė.

A broken relationship does not alleviate the roles of father and mother

The sociologist emphasizes that the two things feed off each other: the current legal situation is not very favorable for the parents, but the interpersonal relationships of the parents also tend to negatively affect the participation of parents in raising children after divorce. When stereotypical attitudes are followed too strictly, that is, the mother only acts as a guardian and the father only as the breadwinner, the best interests of the child are overlooked.

“We often don’t separate the breakdown of a parenting relationship from the parenting relationship. Often the relationship with a child becomes a tool in conflicts between parents, which are often unavoidable and accompany divorce, ”he says.

Attitudes toward parenthood after divorce are slowly changing

Speaking of the changes that have occurred in the last two decades, A. Maslauskaitė noted that we are moving in a good direction in Lithuania.

“The question of parental involvement in the upbringing and upbringing of the child after the breakdown of the parental relationship is increasingly raised in the public sphere. A great step was taken when the Civil Code was amended almost two decades ago and the legal framework for divorce was reorganized. Although in very small steps, looking at the concept of parenthood we see positive changes. Participation in the life of a child is more a promotion through various social policy measures, which show the benefits of the participation of parents in the upbringing of a child. Therefore, these norms are changing little by little “, says the professor of the University Vytautas Magnus.

According to the sociologist, society can expect more radical changes, but more often they are slow and less significant.

“You have to keep in mind that we are rewriting society, our expectations of what parents should and how they should do, and we are assigning more and more inclusive parenting roles to men. “Naturally, after divorce, some men who have already become involved in the care and upbringing of the child need to continue their paternity and not assume the role of a” missing “father or a father who only pays child support.” , the researcher concluded.

2020 A representative public opinion poll conducted by the Office of the Equal Opportunity Ombudsman in July 2006 showed that the public wants more active parental involvement in the care of children. Up to 71 percent. women in the study and 56% men said they believe dads can care for young children as well as moms. Very similar results were obtained in terms of equitable sharing of responsibilities between parents. Equal opportunity experts view these public attitudes favorably and prospectively.