The hard part of the actors: the woman is in a psychiatric hospital, the husband suffers from depression and barely lives with the children | Life

The source of income was cut off due to the quarantine.

7 years ago, Judita and Nerijus founded a children’s theater “Nothing for Himself”, which was the main activity of the couple. With the onset of the pandemic, his work stopped, but the summer began to gradually recover. Unfortunately, a second quarantine was announced in the fall and the family ceased again.

“After accumulating a creative baggage over the years, we decided to share short shows” Quarantine Afternoons “on Facebook and YouTube. It was a three-month cycle of 33 shows in which we played original songs for children and adults, we read poetry We broadcast all of this online from our one-bedroom apartment, basement, balcony or snowy forest, ”says N. Laurinavičius.

The actor does not hide the fact that he had to do everything possible at the time, and the family was not going to sit idly by. The Quarantine Afternoons helped the couple survive financially, as viewers could be thankful for purchasing a token ticket, helping Neria and Judith survive a difficult period.

“When it was necessary to postpone all activities, it was painful, we did not dream of such a world situation in the most terrible dream, but little by little we reconciled. Various ideas were constantly stirring in our minds, and resources and forces were not always sufficient for their implementation, says N. Laurinavičius. – We offered the viewer an intellectual product, and during this period, when all cultural spaces are closed, we feel that people really miss it and accept it with pleasure. However, it is never easy to ask the public for help in support, given the views of a certain dominant section of society. “

Asking for public support for support is never easy, knowing the attitudes of a certain dominant sector of society towards it.

The show cycle helped them not only financially, but also emotionally; Although they sat closed at home, they were still able to turn around in theater-related activities. According to Nerijus, this allowed them to create the rhythm of the day, because they had to film the shows and prepare the program.

“We remember not only the repertoire of the Teatro Nada para el Teatro, but also the repertoire of our musical tandem“ El silencio de la seda ”created 10 years ago. In autumn, before the restrictions were so strict, we even managed to professionally record a song with opera soloist Liudas Mikalauskas, which we also performed live at one of our shows, ”says N. Laurinavičius.

During the quarantine period, the couple repeatedly received calls from those around them to complete requests to the Cultural Council and ask for support; according to Nerijus, a considerable amount of additional money was available. However, after several requests, the family did not receive help from the city council.

“We provide examples of meaningful and quality educational content for children, but once we received a negative response and another, no. Although we actively participate in theatrical activities, we only invest our own funds in the preparation of educational programs and do not seek help, says N Laurinavičius. “I suspect that the situation in the council is not, to put it mildly, very transparent, and it seems that without a canny lobbyist, the front will not break the boundaries of nepotism.”

Nerijus says that people’s interest in the shows was wavy, but they appreciated his every encouragement and were inspired to continue and not stop. Although, as the actor himself says, the couple is not very well known, the creative activity really helps them make a living, and for now, they also survive on the benefits.

“We receive 260 euros from the state for the affected individual doctors, the wife receives a disability benefit. We are hardened by life, so we can survive even on a very limited income,” says N. Laurinavičius.

We are a hardened life, so even with a very limited income we can survive.

Live in a one bedroom apartment.

A family of four, along with a fifth member, a cat, currently lives in a one-bedroom apartment; Nerijus does not hide the fact that it is increasingly difficult for everyone to live together in such conditions.

“I have heard stories from a family of several people living in one bedroom. This means that living on a quad with a cat is still not bad at all. Seriously, it is possible, but soon we will have to think about changes ”, admits N. Laurinavičius.

The family moved into the apartment when the children were still young, but today they are turning into teenagers. And what about the fact that a room should accommodate not only four people, but also the work team that spouses need.

“When we moved, we were happy to be able to buy at least one such house without loans. But today we are pushing more and more to the sides, we have grown the apartment like a jersey. Also, here we have to accommodate the props of five performances, several teams, so everything has to be arranged in a very calculated way. However, in a small space, we still turn everything around quickly “, Nerijus does not hide.

If the family still fit in the apartment before the quarantine, now they are having many more problems. All family members participate in distance learning or other activities, making it difficult to find a quiet corner.

“Recently, I want to grunt: both kids’ distance learning hell is attacking from all sides. You can try to hide in a glazed balcony or toilet, but the walls are poorly soundproof. Before the pandemic, we were trying to move into larger homes, but now hopes have been dashed. It is especially difficult for a wife struggling with illness, who needs a separate space to rest and regain strength, ”says Nerijus.

Lately, they want to grunt: both kids’ distance learning hell is attacking from all sides.

N. Laurinavičius’s wife suffers from severe depression, is anxious and has thought disorders. As a result of these diseases, persistent tachycardia, high blood pressure, she developed palpitations, an enlarged heart, and oral medications did not help her.

“From the age of 16, he had to save his mother’s life all the time; when we married, we were expecting a second child, and in the last month of Judith’s pregnancy, her mother committed suicide. And recently, his wife’s father was found dead in the river, someone killed him because he had a large bruise under his eye. Still, the police treated it as an accident. Such a concentration of disasters would be enough for more than one person, but she still clung to life , to the family. Only a lot of underrated creative activity broke the last fuses, “says Nerijus.

Due to anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, and an altered autonomic nervous system, Judith’s body responds to everything like stress. Becoming disabled and having 35 percent. ability to work, in the summer he lay in a hospital where he applied electroshock therapy.

“After a heart attack, a full course of therapy was not done. The condition improved relatively, but changed to strong anxiety and mania. In an attempt to control her anxiety, she became addicted to sedatives that caused memory problems. Deliberately, as soon as I left the hospital, we had to immerse ourselves in the active activities of the theater, because we had many preliminary obligations and, in the long run, Judita could hardly walk, ”recalls N. Laurinavičius.

As soon as we left the hospital we had to immerse ourselves in the active activities of the theater, because we had many pre-commitments and, in the long run, Judita could hardly walk.

Judita is currently being treated in a hospital where treatment has started, drip trays are being built and the objective is to cleanse the body of sedatives. At the same time, lighter drugs will be prescribed and thus dependence on them will be reduced.

“He will spend at least a few months in the hospital. The process is long and complicated, returning home will require long-term psychotherapy, which is very expensive with a good specialist. Unfortunately, the state does not fund it, ”says Nerijus.

The family suffers along with Judith

N. Laurinavičius, who stays at home with her two children, says they don’t need much care anymore, but she has to prepare to eat, run the house, and try to focus, read, write, create and manage important things. , so that the day goes unnoticed.

“My wife suffers the most, but everyone in our family suffers more or less because these diseases are insidious, they have many tentacles. If they used to have fun together, they have to be sad together, ”says Nerijus.

The story of N. Laurinavičius himself is also full of painful and complex trials. A man who has survived independently since adolescence today suffers from chronic depression with mild manifestations of bipolar disorder.

“When I was 13 years old, my mother died and I never met my real father. I lived with my stepfather and sister, but it was a very difficult time and difficult living conditions. I didn’t care about anyone, so I can say that I lived alone. I have had to support myself since I was a teenager: I sold newspapers at the station, worked in construction in the summer and then all kinds of jobs, ”Nerijus recalls, adding that his first autobiographical novel will be published soon, revealing many childhood stories. painful and fun.

I didn’t care about anyone, so I can say that I lived alone.

Despite the trials and tribulations of quarantine that both Judith and Nerie experience, they still manage to maintain a positive aspect that is felt even virtually. N. Laurinavičius admits that when he falls to the lowest point, he always tries to get up and hang, although it requires great effort.

“I am a tragicomic person, I don’t even have to play in tragicomedies. A man is alive before he can laugh. I am always drawn behind my hair by a creative fire somewhere deep in my heart. Even if Judita fails to revive the theater I intend to continue writing children’s books, ”says the actor.

If you want to support a family tandem during a difficult period, you can do so as follows:

Judita Šmitaitė-Laurinavičienė

LT524010042401066927

“Luminor” bankas,

Object – Commercial certificate. No. NF714128-1