[ad_1]
The Renios newspaper was translated into Lithuanian by Ugnė Ražinskaitė and published by Alma littera. Elizabeth Bellak supplemented the blog with an introduction, observations and final comments. The sisters were very close, perhaps because they were both very artistic. Renia – wrote essays and poetry, Elizabeth – played. The young man’s talent was discovered when he was just 8 years old and starred in Polish films. Unfortunately, the careers of both sisters were interrupted by the war.
From the 15th until her death, her thoughts spilled over into a blog, Renia, 18, was murdered. Elizabeth managed to escape, she lives in New York with her children. From there, a conversation between Elizabeth Bellak and Augustine Gittins.
For many years you lived as if you were separated from your Jewish identity. Did you finally get it back?
I grew up in a family that was not particularly religious. I was born Jewish, my grandmother lit candles on Saturday, but we didn’t really pray every day. Mom believed that Catholicism saved us all: emigrating to the United States became a whole new personality, we had different names and practiced Catholicism. I attended a Catholic school and my mother went to church.
I always knew where it came from, but in New York I created a new life for myself, Judaism seemed to have no interest for me. Only the book helped bring him closer. When we launched it, it seemed like it wasn’t diving into my past. And I followed her.
You can buy “Diary of Renios” at the online bookstore zmonesknygos.lt
Elizabeth Bellak with daughter Alexandra / Photo from personal album.
When you look back on your life now, how do you see it?
I was simply accompanied by success. Sister’s beloved, Sigismund, secretly removed Renius and his parents from the ghetto and hid them in the attic. There they were found by the Nazis and killed. He took me from the ghetto to my best friend’s house, which made my life completely different. I was lucky to stay alive. I am thankful for that, but I did not escape the guilt that my sister did not survive.
Have you ever returned to Poland? How did you feel there?
I first returned to Poland fourteen years ago. I didn’t feel like going back, I went to a country that had caused me so much pain because the children wanted to see where it came from, where my roots were.
In fact, the Maciek mentioned on Renia’s blog would have forbidden me to do that if only I had known. He and his childhood friend Marcel Tuchman managed to reestablish old ties in the United States. By the way, before returning to New York, he was seriously ill. That trip was undoubtedly too emotional, it brought deep hidden memories to the surface. For many years he had carried them to the ends of the soul.
After that trip, I returned to Poland twice more. I even stayed at the Raffles Europejski in Warsaw, where I lived with my mother for several years during the war. It is now a five-star hotel with excellent staff and excellent service. And back then, we could have been shot at any time. What can I say? The atmosphere is very different … During my last visits to Poland, I felt much stronger, I was even happy to share my sister’s story there.
Your sister Renia’s diary returned in the strangest way, apparently knocking on the door one morning. How did you feel when you held the diary of a dear but already dead sister in your hands for the first time?
Sister Amada Zygmund somehow managed to find us in New York. My mother and I didn’t even know that such a blog existed. Zygmund knocked on the door of our house one day in 1950 and handed it to us. It is difficult to know what kind of wave was flooded when we took the blog in our hands. It was both joyous and too painful to turn it around, read it. Both my mother and I did not feel emotionally prepared for that. The blog was locked in the safe for many years, but one day my daughter Alexandra became interested in it.
Many people who read the book have no idea what war is. What is the life of a person devastated by war?
No one can suggest suggestively what it means to survive a war unless the listener has experienced it. Every day is a matter of life and death and you will do everything possible to survive. War is horrible. Every day you don’t know if you are eating today, where you are sleeping or if you are sleeping, or maybe tomorrow you won’t be shot. He was only a child, but he was clearly aware of the dangers of war. I knew what I had to do, so I grew up very fast. Laughter was called the Polish Shirley Temple, and I used my acting skills to create a new identity for myself. This is the most difficult role I have ever played.
When you were a child, you experienced horrible discrimination just because you were Jewish. How do you feel today when we return to talk about racial inequality?
I am appalled at the increase in anti-Semitism, xenophobia, and wasted anger in those who are not the same as you. I see and feel the same black nationalism that I observed during World War II. We should learn from our mistakes, be together, not be angry and broken. In America today, I see terrible inequality. It hurts me a lot.
Why was it important to you that your sister Renia’s extremely personal diary be published?
First of all, this is important to my daughter Alexandra Bellak. She was the man who brought Renia’s story to light. Mudvi and mom would have left my sister’s blog intact in the safe. Its content was too heartbreaking. But Alexandra wanted to know more. About the past and the woman whose name was called. After reading Renia’s blog, I hoped to understand each other better. Today I am delighted with what I have discovered. I am happy that my sister, so mature and wonderful, seems to be alive again today. In the book. It is important that young people understand and appreciate the benefits of a democratic society. After all, during the war we had to survive in a terrible world where human life is completely degraded. Renė wanted to become famous. Today, your wish has come true.
Elizabeth Bellak / Photo from personal album.
What is your most vivid and moving memory of your sister?
My sister was like a mother to me because I was separated from my mother for two years. Six years older than me, Renia took care of me, she had everything: a friend, a teacher, a mother. I was wrapped in heat when I cried, when I missed my mother. We lived with grandparents who were good but much older, perhaps sometimes unable to show their love. Hard and lonely time … Renia was always there, she guided me through it.
After years of silence, she told her children about life in Poland. How did they react to the newly discovered part of their lives? To the fact that there are semi-Jews?
In fact, my husband Georg was also born into a Jewish family in Vienna, Austria. He came to the United States with his parents, like me, growing up in a secular family, but our children knew his origins. I think they were interested in my choice to remain silent. Finally, her daughter Alexandra decided to take the history and the family legacy into her own hands.
Elizabeth Bellak with daughter Alexandra / Photo from personal album.
Even in the most difficult moments of life, people do not lose their feelings. Is love in the ghetto different from love in the free world?
I don’t remember living in a ghetto myself. We were not there long, Zygmund saved us. But even for that short time there, I felt like I was in jail. I can only imagine what it means to leave all your belongings at home. My poor grandparents, who moved into those crowded rooms, really had to be crushed. And above all, they were all intimidated by the unknown.
Don’t compare yourself to a love ghetto where you are imprisoned behind a barbed wire fence and you have to constantly remember that you can be shot. Behind that fence you would only be a free man. Everything different.
What messages do you think such testimonies send to future generations?
Renia teaches future generations that people should be grateful for everything they have. Food on the table, roof over your head. When you live without fear that someone knocks on your door and takes you out. You need to learn to be grateful. Enjoy what you have. Quarantine was a good time to think about how we really live.
I went through a terrible war. Today, I hope to survive another invisible pandemic. People at that time were forced to use the Star of David so that everyone knew who they were. Today I put on a mask to show respect to everyone around me.
[ad_2]
