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In the opinion of D. Adomavičius, if young people sent out of the nursing home to independent life were given a shelter from the state and social workers reached out a helping hand, perhaps they would not have had to make such mistakes.
The songs can only imagine what a royal family is. He was immediately placed in a foster home. After spending all his childhood and adolescence there, at the age of eighteen, he had to close the doors of the Algimantas Bandza social services house. D. Adomavičius initially stayed with his friends, then the shelter provided them with shelter.
“As far as I know, seventeen orphans who have received social housing can register in the queue, but for some reason the residence did not process the necessary documents. I had to hug my friends. And other friends from my destination go out into the unknown, who you can, look for a roof over your head, ”said the orphan.
He received almost three thousand euros from the state for the beginning of his life. He bought a television for them, but it was soon stolen from his bedroom in a vocational school dormitory. And they did not manage to use the remaining money, they were deceived by the young man in question.
“That money can be spent on renting a house, studying or studying things. There was a benefactor who supposedly wanted to help me fill out the documents, but pointed to my account instead of mine. And I took out loans in my name, and they still misappropriated the money from the municipality. I later learned that I was not the only one affected by it. For some, it is a kind of business: earning the trust of people like me and then deceiving them, “said D. Adomavičius.
It did not conjure up a sense of parenthood
Although the man who put Dainiai in debt has already been turned over to the police, the guy doesn’t really think he can get the money back. D. Adomavičius is not hiding, he tried to hang out in every way, but when he met the wrong friends, he got into an even bigger swamp. Realizing that he had hit rock bottom, Dainius set out in search of a never-before-seen biological father, awaiting his help.
The boy is open: he has always been in contact with his mother, but at this moment, a mother who spends days in a social care home could not help her son much. And according to Dainius, his father lives in Biržai. The first meeting was not what the nineteen-year-old had imagined: there was no place for his son in the father’s house.
“I expected our relationship with my father to be different, but he was drunk, so I no longer communicate,” says D. Adomavičius.
Dainius is now processing documents for social housing. He also found a temporary job and was waiting for calls from employers.
Shock is inevitable
According to D. Adomavičius, if young people leaving the nursing home had a roof over their heads, the beginning of an independent life would be much easier. It would also be a motivation to look for work faster, since you would not only have to take care of yourself, but also maintain the housing that the state gives you.
“It is not a life in a shelter or with friends that encourages me to fight for something else, to motivate myself. If the young people who left the nursing home immediately received social housing, they would not have to wander the streets ”, Dainius is convinced.
According to him, the state-created care system is failing significantly. As soon as they come of age, young people run away from a nursing home and have to hang out alone. But the seething life behind the fences of nursing homes is very different from your imagination. In the nursing home, the students receive food and clothing and receive money for their own expenses, but after leaving the government institution, they must take care of themselves.
“There is a rule and a procedure in a nursing home, and when you go out to live on your own, you create them yourself. There is a kind of commotion, so it is very important to have someone to help plan finances or at least advise ”, says D. Adomavičius.
Family searches are disappointing
Salomėja Jareckienė, deputy director of Algimantas Bandza House of Social Services for Social Work and Education, recalls that after turning 18, Dainius left the residence and wanted to be independent. According to the deputy, even those who have reached the age of majority can continue to live in a welfare institution while studying at a high school or gym, and those who choose to study in professional schools or universities stay in their dormitory.
“Dainius did not want that, he planned to go abroad, but then we found out that he was not leaving. It is really unfortunate dealing with people with a bad reputation. These, taking advantage of the confidence of the guy, deceived him. These children often imagine that all those around them are sincere and deeply disappointed, ”says S. Jareckienė, a former student.
According to her, all those who move to independent life receive a one-time installation allowance of almost three thousand euros, and can also process documents for social housing. Most young people rent a house and, to make it cheaper, they usually stay in a room for two. It is rare that they interact with a biological family.
“It is no secret that those who have left first try to find the closest people: their parents, but there is often a lot of frustration. If the parents were not interested in caring for their children while living in a home it would be naive to expect them to regain parental feelings as adults. That royal family becomes the children they grew up with in a nursing home. The wards are very supportive of each other. I know there are a lot of people who have gone to outside and has settled there, then they help each other, they invite them to themselves “, said the deputy of the residence.
Taught to live
According to S. Jareckienė, now that the children no longer live in mass foster homes, but in families, they gain more independence: they not only learn to cook, to buy essentials, but also to plan expenses. Adolescents who have been living in families with social workers for several years now have their own bank account, to which the children’s money and orphan’s benefits flow.
“These children probably pay much more for their jobs than their peers who grow up in families. They are capable of everything, including managing matters in the bank, the City Council, the Fiscal Inspection. Of course, each has a separate story, so even after starting an independent life, their destinies unfold differently. We have many beautiful and successful examples, so my heart aches when life doesn’t happen to anyone, ”said S. Jareckienė.
Although the nursing home does not provide escort care after the students leave, the deputy says that many continue to be in contact with the institution’s staff, who attend alumni weddings and even baptize children. According to S. Jareckienė, it is very important that you want to accept that help.
“Dainius does not accept help. When asked how he was doing, he always said that he was very good, but we learned from those around him that it was definitely not good. Our opportunities are limited, we cannot support them financially, but we can always help with advice ”Says the deputy.
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