Spouses who have become guardians: it is strange how people emphasize the blood connection; after all, even when their own child is born, they don’t fall in love right away.

One week before the events of Caregiving Week June 28-July 4 and Guardian’s Day July 4, all 66 “Children are Children” care centers share the personal stories of caregivers and their wards .

Now the family of Miglė, Martynas, Meilutė and Margiris live in the Kaunas district. Miglė is a lawyer, in her free time she likes to sew, read, she is interested in real estate, ecology. Martynas runs his business, he is interested in cars, beekeeping and antiques. Son Margiris attends kindergarten, likes to play games, watch movies about heroes. And the frequented Meilutė is a schoolgirl, she likes to play sports, try various makeup and manicure solutions, says the press release.

Meilutė’s love story began in 2013, when Migė began volunteering at an orphanage. Meilute was then 10 years old. “The girl was a very beautiful and charming girl. They talked a lot, they listened, they smiled. We thought it was wrong for her to live in a foster home, we wanted to help her grow. We felt we had something to share, ”says Miglė.

Martynas agrees with her: “When Miglė volunteered, I had no doubts. Dear son, but you don’t know much, you don’t experiment, you test yourself. I liked Meilutė, we wanted to help her. “

Initially, the family met with Meilute twice a week in a nursing home, did homework, and talked. After that, he began to ask permission to go out together to the city, to the cinema, to the theater, to the cafe.

“When we started to meet Meilute, I was a senior, I wrote a master’s thesis, I was preparing for the final exam. When Meilutė visited us on weekends, we still lived in an 18-square-meter apartment, then we started building in an unfurnished house. When we process guardianship documents, we attend guardianship courses and prepare Meilutė’s room. We finished the job just before we moved in, ”says Miglė enthusiastically.

We still look weird at parenting meetings because we are so much younger

It was so coincidental that both Meilutė and Margiris came to the family almost at the same time. Meilutė came home on February 12 and Margiris was born on April 2. Life has changed drastically.

“I felt needed by Meilute, even when I started visiting her on weekends. I saw that she was waiting for me, coming back after the weekend bragging, the other children were jealous. It was sad because I realized how little my attention gets and caring, but still so much more than the other children. It was strange to bring her home. Thoughts revolve around how much we haven’t shown, told or tasted together yet. I wanted to take care of her, take care of her. Love came slowly. The connection with so much with Meilute as with Margiris was established when they became mutual, ”says Miglė.

According to Martynas, the mutual connection with Meilute was established when she got rid of her and started spending more time together.

Caregivers still find it strange that older people exaggerate the blood bond. According to Miglė, some aunts wonder how a stranger is brought home, and they don’t even communicate with their relatives: “And when your own child is born, you don’t fall in love right away. Take care, live, love ”.

Young caregivers also faced a variety of challenges. Sometimes awkward situations arose when Meilutė had to introduce herself. “I didn’t want to put Meilutė in an awkward position and call her a ward. When I introduced myself to my mother, I wasn’t sure if it would suit her. Once she has moved into our house, the situation will be easier to handle. Still, though. we look strange at parents’ meetings, because we are much younger, ”says Miglė with a smile.

Love also had to adapt to the rules, a constant demand to follow them. As she says, it was strange that everyone had to gather at the table, go to the guests together, always celebrate the holidays together. “It was unusual that food was always in the fridge. After getting rid of them, I had to become much more independent, independently ride the bus to school, and sometimes get up myself, ”Meilutė says.

Wish future caregivers the courage to make a decision.

Currently, Miglė and Martynas are trying to share childcare, take turns in kindergarten, and participate in parent meetings.

“We all try to get together, we often have a late dinner, because Martynas takes time to work. But we try to wait, because the goal is not to eat, but to be together and socialize. From Monday to Friday, we also try to sit at a common table to Have dinner. Participation is necessary, they cannot eat, but they must stay together. On weekends we have breakfast together, “says Miglė, adding that together with Meilute, she makes, organizes, goes for a walk, often sits down to drink tea and chat.

Both caregivers love new challenges, a variety of new activities, are open to innovation, and are confident in their own strengths. “This is how we try to raise children. We encourage them to try different things, to believe that the work put in, the effort is worth it, that is why it is always worth the effort,” says the family of caregivers.

They wish future guardians the courage to make a decision. “We believe that we do not need to focus on children, we just have to live together. We, as parents, have created a family, but that is not our only role and we must show by example how to be strong, confident, pursue and achieve our dreams. , not giving up when we fail. Sometimes that example is enough to make someone’s life completely different, “the young caregivers do not hesitate, and they accepted Meilutė into their welcoming family.