The psychotherapist Eugenijus Laurinaitis said how long it takes to fall in love: it is like an infection that changes the perception of reality

“This MO Museum exhibit is not about love. This exhibition is about a person’s place in the world. The title of the show is not about what it shows, but what it doesn’t show. And it does not show how to get out of suffering, how to get out of it. Love in this sense is the only way out of suffering. There is no other, ”Professor Eugenijus Laurinaitis shared his thoughts on the exhibition in a press release.

So what is love and how to achieve it?

First, separate love from love.

E. Laurinaitis states that love has two different forms. The teacher describes the first form of love as falling in love: “It attacks a person and even before they have time to reciprocate, the person is already ill. Is love. It is like an infectious disease that changes the perception of reality. “

According to E. Laurinaitis, falling in love takes between 3 and 6 months. “It just came to our knowledge then. And then there is the possibility of love coming,” says the professor.

Only after the infatuation stage can one finally realize that this is the person you want to live life with. E. Laurinaitis adds that the stage of love is very difficult, because then it is understood that love needs two people, that love is not based only on feelings, it is based on daily work.

“We have to wake up every morning and tell ourselves that I love this person I live with. And that means I have to accept some of its characteristics, I need to change something myself. But I’ll also have to show you where the red lines are, at which point they will need to change. And so it will be for the rest of his life, ”says the professor.

Why is it difficult to love?

“Love is a relationship. And that is why it is so difficult to love. A relationship is a constant work of finding a connection between them and discussing what will or will not be, what will succeed or what will fail. By doing this work, the result will always be a compromise ”, says E. Laurinaitis.

And directly to the question of why it is difficult to love, the teacher simply answers: “Because loving requires a change in itself. And changing yourself is the hardest part. We all have only one person we can change: ourselves. “

Start – from love for yourself

Analyzing various forms of love, Professor E. Laurinaitis adds that only when a person loves himself does he know what it means to love another.

“Love is a connection, a relationship. The relationship also does not agree with its internal parts, which are different. But there must also be a connection between them. We all have to find a compromise. There is no other way. There is no connection with your parts. internal, who are different, who have different desires, ideas, dreams and illusions “.

E. Laurinaitis also adds that from love for ourselves, which is the most difficult thing, for us Lithuanians, love for others can begin.