Užkalnis got on the rake at the Juodkrante restaurant: “there will be no third time”

Before, I was in the “Juodasis Kalnas” restaurant, at the time of the litas, and there I was very bad. The restaurant excelled at abnormally large portions, but the food was such that the smaller the portion, the better.

Now my friend persuaded me to go, finding a smart menu on Facebook (it still hangs there). That menu just didn’t include ramen and octopus with chorizo, and “Aubrak beef cutlet with white crab leg, grilled melted butter with veggies and herbs” for € 47 and wagyu beef steak (written in the New York Strip cutout ). my favorite), € 14 for 100 grams. When I see high prices, my heart sings, I think, yes, this is definitely the place for me (I like to pay a lot and have repeatedly asked restaurants to raise prices, so I have a lot of affection on the part of readers ).

There was hardly anything promised in the restaurant posted on the notice board. There wasn’t even the same menu; instead, a short list of dishes was optimized, with no New York for you and no snow crab for you. Maybe the season is over? Baikit, I don’t think, the restaurant is full of people, and they are served by a meeting waiter, benevolent and in the downstairs, but any of those low, if the soup spills in a hurry.

Scary music contributes to the absurd mood, as in Mexican series. I don’t know if CDs with the soundtracks of Mexican series (about Chuanitas and Pedro) are sold anywhere in the world, but it is probably one of them.

As for the sole waiter and the amputated menu, I honestly like the annual approach of the Curonian Spit hospitality masters, when the restaurant closes in early September or there are only a few dishes left on the menu, it sells leftovers, not worth ordering , it is not worth hiring it. Meanwhile, hundreds of people are scattered around the resorts for whom there is no place to eat (because only those who do not like to eat or like to punish themselves drive to “Curonian Spit”), and businessmen shake hands, “who they might have thought it would be such a warm fall. ” But the problem with your chronic misunderstanding isn’t that you don’t guess the weather. Your problem is that you want to save and use in September to shove leftovers at minimal cost, or just close the door, and then no one has to pay wages and zero costs. And the guests don’t want to be fed leftovers and therefore can’t come to pay you if the restaurant is closed.

There is only one rare species in the entire world of wildlife: a coastal businessman who lives outside the laws of nature. Roe deer do not try to crush the concrete because there is no grass growing there. Don’t go for a cod walk in the coastal dunes because there is no water there. Even the cheburek sellers are so smart that they don’t walk through the Dzūkija forests with their chebureks in February, because there are no holidaymakers there. But a Lithuanian seaside businessman seriously hopes to make money from a closed restaurant.

This is the Black Mountain and its crisis menu (or apocalypse). Let’s try it anyway, right? The brand’s eel fish for nine euros was special not only because it was bitter, but also only a piece of eel was put on it. I know there is a variety of French minimalist nouvelle cuisine here from the Baltic shores – Lithuanian Ubag style.

The mushroom risotto (€ 15) consisted of cooked rice porridge with mushrooms, which was stretched to a slimy consistency. This is our Lithuanian heritage, our proud tradition of the collective farm mentality: the best we have (mushrooms) must be spoiled by throwing it ten times, and the meat must always be fried, dried, and then stored with some gluten-free sauce, well , or by baking cheese on top (with pineapple).

For the hamburger (€ 16.50) served with wagyu beef, the meat was average and the bun stood out for its low price. He did not cope with the task at all, he could not absorb anything and maintain the structure of the plate. I can’t verify if there really was wagyu meat, but using wagyu meat where minced meat is used is almost useless: the essence of wagyu is the intramuscular fat layer, which is especially nice when eating a steak, and after going through the grinder from meat, the structure disappears, how to buy caviar from bones and put it in a blender to make fish-flavored porridge; Although no, there is a reason: after writing a menu that wagyu, you can offer a burger for an absurd price.

I still wonder a lot why the restaurant, which has wagyu meat, grinds it to make burgers and bakes the ribeye steak.

The potato pancakes were average, but the mackerel we chose as an additive was completely off topic and not at all. I know we chose ourselves because we’ve never had pancakes with mackerel before, but that’s the kind of thing you try once. Salmon goes well with potato pancakes and mackerel, but also fish, somehow not. Here, like chocolate-filled kibinas – once you try, you think maybe there will be a genius here, like an Italian folded pizza calzone with Nutella cream, and then you realize that no, you don’t have to do kibinas with chocolate.

We paid 63.30 euros and tips.

What is the conclusion? I was twice, the third time they would take me unless they tied me up. The Lithuanian caterer has drilled the bottom here, dug deep, drilled the second, and is approaching the third.

One goose in five.

Black Mountain, Ievos Kalno str. 22, Juodkrante. Tel: +370 673 83893.

Adjusting working hours before visiting is little of what they write in the Newsletter.