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If this was real, it would have been a perfect comic moment.
But it was not like that. It was Micheál Martin standing in the Dáil to show his coalition’s peculiar talent for synchronization.
How they did it?
Something really bad must be happening. This could explain why the Government announced the appointment of 10 new advisers (outside the traditional transfer window) to the Ministers of State when it had just cut the pandemic unemployment payment and many people are very worried and wondering if they will go back to work. .
A ruse to divert attention from something else, perhaps?
Maybe not, but even if this is not the case, there is a buzz from boys and girls jobs about this movement at such a delicate time. Apparently 10 of our squad of 17 ministers of state successfully advocated for a full-time special adviser to help them set the world on fire, which is what everyone dreams of doing but rarely does.
Which raises all kinds of questions about the remaining seven. Too useless to defend a personal assistant or deserve a dedicated confidant? Or is it too smart and efficient to need one?
The Super Seven or the Stoopid Seven? Time will tell. Or maybe they have less ego than the Terrific or the Terrible 10. Why the others were left out was a question that was considered uselessly at Leinster House.
Of course, this new addition would join the staff already working under the warm rays of our three “super-junior” ministers. They automatically have advisers to hold them so they don’t fall out of their special high chairs on the cabinet table and get hurt.
Too late
News of the hiring of even more ministerial cushioning came too late Tuesday morning for the Opposition to react publicly, but Sinn Féin’s Mary Lou McDonald managed to briefly bring it up to the Taoiseach.
He responded by telling her that she was not the type to talk, as Sinn Féin in Northern Ireland had always been a supporter of special advisers. Which is true, but it didn’t take away from her point that the circumstances surrounding the ad weren’t good and the decision at this point to hire more consultants seemed decidedly wrong.
On the other hand, these folks complaining about their pandemic unemployment pay cut are getting upset.
Let’s call a shovel a shovel.
Why can’t they go work with a government minister like everyone else?
It’s terrible that they get fired and lose their jobs, but couldn’t they just retrain or something? For example, there are many job opportunities in the growth areas of boosting fragile egos and caring for baby ministers.
We are not made of money, you know?
Do you realize how much it costs these days to keep ministers as special advisers? They grow so fast. Happy at first with a loud promo and a cupcake. In no time, circling the place with paid entourages and chase complexes.
These top ministers crave the constant attention of an expensive team of carefully selected assistants who can help them see the big picture and be seen in bigger pictures. The civil service simply cannot provide this kind of experience, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
But the little ones are also very demanding. Young ministers also need advisers.
But maybe not quite now, in the current climate, with the Covid-19 shutdowns causing financial problems for people who would normally be working and earning a scab. Last week’s cut in pandemic unemployment pay will have hit them hard.
Not to mention workers who thought the worst was over when restrictions were eased and went back to work, only to be informed last Friday that a worrying spike in cases meant their businesses had to immediately close again. Then there are those who live in constant fear of being next.
Make the case
Tuesday’s news that the government boosted the number of advisers on the state payroll will have fallen like a lead balloon with all of them.
The Taoiseach defended the pay cut at Leaders’ Questions on Tuesday when Sinn Féin’s Mary Lou McDonald urged him to reverse the decision. Catherine Murphy of the Social Democrats echoed her point, saying the reduction in support was “a double whammy” for workers laid off a second time.
Micheál Martin has his argument well prepared: initially the payment was intended to last a period of 12 weeks; That had to spread and will continue, but the economic impact of the pandemic could last all of next year. The government must be careful and prudent in its spending.
But it didn’t look good.
However, the Taoiseach is fortunate that a question still remains in the air as to whether the chosen 10 needed special help to do something or whether the remaining seven had been cruelly overlooked and should be given due recognition.
Otherwise, he would have to deal with Mary Lou and a socially estranged donut of serious-faced colleagues who marched to the pedestal to demand Justice for the Scorned Seven and would stand in solidarity with them until their case is resolved.
Still, it’s good to see that some sectors of the job market are still bullish on the best small country to be a junior minister.
Ten special advisers, haunting the Dáil.
Ten special advisers, haunting the Dáil.
And if a special advisor accidentally falls
There will be more new Special Advisors around the Dáil.
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