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Naughty winks
There are numerous different routes a soccer outlet can take when reporting a goal like the one Harry Winks scored on Thursday night.
You can let it speak for itself and just keep referring to how you were at 56 yards, capitalizing on the distance and making it bold, like Sun.
You can ask if he meant it or not even though he blatantly didn’t and admitted it as such, as the Online Mail.
You can turn it into a selection of random fan Twitter posts, like Soccer, London.
Or you can use it to pretend that there is some kind of problem between a player and a manager because nothing sells like controversy, even after a comfortable 4-0 win for the current Premier League leaders, who could afford to rest. quite. very much to all maintaining its excellent recent form.
Credit, then to Goal.com for this:
‘Mourinho unhappy with Winks after goal admission’
And also to Daily mirror with this terrible offering:
Just Jose! Mourinho, unhappy with Winks after the admission of the Spurs star
Removing the word ‘goal’ changes the whole dynamic and they know it. It is no longer a jovial and cheerful comment from a coach, but an expression of annoyance towards a player who recently admitted his own frustration in the absence of opportunities.
Even when talkSPORT you can paste ‘jokes’ into the headline, there really is no excuse.
Imagine watching that game, hearing those words and deciding to pretend that there is a problem between Mourinho and one of his players. This is one of those incredibly rare scenarios where a piece of ‘Twitter reacts’ is preferable. And somehow less lazy.
Paul Jiggins Day Paragraph
‘Harry Kane started on the bench, which was a shame because the visitors had Anicent ABEL in his lineup for this clash of barely biblical proportions. ‘
Text book.
Lawro laughs
Mark Lawrenson looks further ahead for Tottenham in his BBC Sport predictions: to his game this weekend against Chelsea.
“Spurs gave a Jose Mourinho masterclass when they beat Manchester City last weekend,” he says.
“It was a great performance and they are playing well, but I feel like Tottenham have to score first for that game plan to be successful.”
Their two biggest wins of the season, both at Southampton and Manchester United, came after they fell behind. As important as “that game plan” is, conceding first is clearly not of the utmost importance to this team.
Return of the Mc
Congratulations to Duncan Wright from Sun for managing to misspell Steve McClaren’s last name three times in the same number of paragraphs in his story about Wayne Rooney taking the sole interim position of Derby.
McLaren, if you were wondering. Too bad he didn’t pick the old-school McClaridge.
Motivation Lacquer
Mediawatch quite likes the description elsewhere in Sun of Alexandre Lacazette as a ‘once prolific finisher’.
He has scored once every three games since joining Arsenal. The man was ‘once prolific’ in Lyon, but certainly not at any point since.
Bridge the gap
“Man Utd warned that” deep-seated problems “could lead to the departure of Bruno Fernandes,” read the headline of the Daily mirror website.
The warning comes from Wayne Bridge, aware of everything Bruno Fernandes and Manchester United. And the club, of course, would have no say in whether a player hired them until at least 2025 leaves or not.
United were fifth in the Premier League, tied on points with seventh place and 36 points behind Liverpool when Fernandes joined. Their most recent league result was a 2-0 home loss to Burnley. He was probably aware of the club’s “deep-seated problems” from the beginning.
Men working
the Manchester evening news are here with the latest episode of a recurring series:
“Manchester United have found two unavoidable midfielders” – 26 November. The Players: Fred and Scott McTominay.
“Manchester United have two must-haves for Ole Gunnar Solskjaer’s perfect approach” – November 16. The players: Bruno Fernandes and Fred.
“Manchester United fans think they could have four new unbeatable” – September 24. The Players: Mason Greenwood, Donny van de Beek, Eric Bailly and Aaron Wan-Bissaka.
“Manchester United confirms new flawless after harsh reality” – 18 August. The player: Luke Shaw.
“Manchester United have a new undefeated streak that cannot be missed” – June 28. The player: Luke Shaw.
“Manchester United fans name a new must-see after Sheffield United win” – June 26. The player: Nemanja Matic.
‘How Manchester United have discovered a new flawless in their attack’ – April 21. The player: Daniel James.
“Manchester United have discovered six indelible” – April 12. The players: Aaron Wan-Bissaka, Harry Maguire, Luke Shaw, Fred, Bruno Fernandes and Anthony Martial.
“Manchester United have a new unmissable match for the Manchester City derby” – March 7. The player: Nemanja Matic.
‘Manchester United could have a new flawless in Eric Bailly after Chelsea performance’ – February 18.
‘Manchester United player Scott McTominay is indisputable claims Ole Gunnar Solskjaer’ – December 4, 2019.
‘Manchester United inescapable restores identity in win against Tottenham’ – December 4, 2019. The player: Marcus Rashford. But also Scott McTominay.
‘Ole Gunnar Solskjaer has another unbeatable Manchester United after Norwich win’ – October 28, 2019. The player: Scott McTominay.
‘Manchester United has a new inescapable in Axel Tuanzebe’ – October 16, 2019.
‘A Manchester United player has become inescapable again’ – February 7, 2019. The player: Nemanja Matic.
‘Manchester United have nine unbeatable under Ole Gunnar Solskjaer’ – January 8, 2019. The players: Phil Jones, Ander Herrera, Nemanja Matic, Anthony Martial, Victor Lindelof, Luke Shaw, David de Gea, Marcus Rashford and Jesse Lingard.
The idea that Manchester United “found” Fred (“indestructible” already in April) and McTominay (“indestructible” last October) is excellent. Have they not been a fairly regular midfield association for about a year?
F365 shithouse story of the day
‘Berbatov explains the only way Man Utd’s master can improve’
Attacking midfielder whose “only weakness” is defense. It is also a bit David Moyes at Manchester United to reduce the “defensive side” of a player to a single deficiency.
Recommended reading of the day
Barney Ronay in Diego Maradona.
Miguel Delaney in Mourinho v Lampard.
Jack Lang in fantasy football. (£)
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