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A legacy of love is the lasting gift Geraldine Mullan received from her husband John and their children Tomás and Amelia.
lost his three loved ones 10 days ago when the family car crashed into Lough Foyle in Co Donegal in a tragic accident at the end of a family day out.
As the sole survivor, you want to send a message to people around the world to express your love for each other, and never take that love for granted.
He told the Sunday Independent about the last few hours the family spent together and spoke of happy years filled with love, generosity and laughter.
“No words will bring my three loved ones back. If I can continue to carry that love for them, then hopefully their love will carry me. I need all the love I can to move on,” he said.
Geraldine’s courage shocked the nation last Monday when she spoke at her funeral in Moville, Co Donegal, urging the congregation to “hug and kiss” their loved ones when they get home and tell them how much they mean to them.
The tragedy occurred on a rainy and windy night on August 20 when his car crashed at Quigley’s Point and was submerged face down in the stormy waters of Lough Foyle.
John (49), owner of a garden center in Moville, Tomás (14) and Amelia (6) died in the accident. Geraldine (45), director of nursing at Letterkenny University Hospital, suffered fractures, bruises and cuts.
She was unable to save them and struggled to survive in the foamy waters until she was finally rescued.
He receives care at his home from family and friends, including his parents, Mautie and Margaret Connaughton, who traveled from Williamstown, Co Galway.
Geraldine told this newspaper: “Appreciate every moment you have with your loved ones because in a minute all that can change. That would be the essence of my message.”
Day after day
The date they died had been set aside by the family as the day they would walk the ‘Stairway to Heaven’, named after the Cuilcagh Boardwalk Trail in Co Fermanagh.
“We had originally planned to spend the day at Fermanagh on ‘Stairway’. We wanted to do it. It’s heartwarming when you think of the words ‘Stairway to Heaven.’ Unfortunately, that’s what we were supposed to be doing.”
But the weather was so bad that they had to change their plan and the family opted to visit the covered Brunswick Moviebowl in Derry.
The four of them enjoyed the days together whenever they could, although August could be a busy month for John at the garden center.
They had busy lives, but love and affection were integrated every day.
“I was a mother who worked as a nurse administrator and I left before 7 am four days a week, but I always received a hug and a kiss from my husband before I went to work.
“Tomás also got up every morning, even when it was too early for school, to give me a hug and a kiss.
“It was the same with Amelia, I had to go give her a hug and a kiss before I left,” he said.
“In the afternoons when he came home around 7:00 PM, he would get a hug and a kiss from the two boys and often John would still work in the garden center next to the house as well. I was walking towards him and he would automatically take him directly into his arms, give me a hug and ask me how my day was.
“John would pick up the kids and take them to school, made lunches and meals. Life was wonderful. He was loving, caring and gentle and he put himself last,” she said.
A love story
John and Geraldine first met when she was breastfeeding her mother Philomena, who died on August 19, 2010, almost 10 years after the day John and the children died.
The couple married in 2012 and young Tomás was best man. Amelia was born in 2013.
Geraldine is very grateful for the day John came into her life. They would chat for seven or eight hours and she didn’t want the conversation to end.
“John was my true love, my soulmate and my best friend … I’m very lucky. John showed me what love was,” she said.
“We loved writing notes and cards to each other. There was a box that I gave John on Valentine’s Day in 2017. On the box was written: ‘Appreciate each day because I love you. When he opened the box, he discovered that he had written notes for him to read every day for the next year, so there were 365 love notes for him, “she said.
“John was a big, strong man, but he didn’t care if there were 20 people in the garden center, he would always tell me he loved me and give me a hug and a kiss.
“People were laughing and joking and saying, ‘Oh, you’re a romantic.’ And John was like, ‘Well, she’s the love of my life,’ “he said.
On her days off from work, Geraldine helped John at the garden center. During the confinement, the four members of the family spent some wonderful days together planting potted plants.
Special link
Tomás was a very loving son and brother. He was a talented musician on the violin and the accordion. Although he had dyslexia, he loved to read and adored the Harry Potter books.
At bedtime Amelia used to say, ‘I want Tomas to read me another chapter of Harry Potter.’
Geraldine said, “I have not yet been brave enough to enter the children’s rooms. In the playroom, I was looking for something and I found his Harry Potter wand.”
Amelia was guided by Tomas when she blew the tin whistle and he was “very patient” with her. Tomás and John were best friends.
Amelia had recently made her debut on the Moville GAA U-8s soccer team. Tomás helped train her in solos and hand passes.
“She was only six years old and she was very nervous and excited two hours before the game,” her mother said.
Geraldine is glad that her camera, found at the crash site, had intact photographs of Amelia in the game.
“I think they talked a lot in the field and I remember her discussing the hairstyle she loved. She was a tomboy sometimes and a girl-girl other times.
“The elementary school asked the pupils to present performances for a talent show during the confinement and Amelia wrote her own little Covid song and sang it in the garden, and as always with Amelia, she had to do a little dance and used a little jazz. hands at the end, “he said.
Brother and sister had a close bond although she could “drive him crazy” at times.
Tomas and Amelia were often seen walking along the local coastal path towards the sea, holding hands and laughing and giggling.
After the tragedy, Geraldine was informed that Amelia was found in her brother’s arms. She said: “That makes me very comfortable knowing that. It breaks my heart not to have them. He was taking care of her until the end.”
A lovely day
On the day of the accident, the children’s school uniforms were prepared, including the placement of Scoil Eoghain’s crest on Amelia’s uniform.
John did some business paperwork and they visited a furniture store. John made lunch and then the family headed happily to Derry, half an hour away.
They were all in excellent shape and eager to go bowling, watch a movie, and have dinner.
They sang songs in the car from The Greatest Showman and had Ed Sheeran sing along. The children played ‘I see, I see’.
At the movies, they saw The Snow Queen with slushies and popcorn. Then they went shopping and John bought colored lights that Amelia wanted to have on her new bunk.
Amelia talked about wanting to fly her new kite when they got home, but John explained that it would be “a little late” when they would return. They then enjoyed dinner together.
“We were all laughing and joking,” Geraldine said.
“When I look back, it will comfort me to have spent that beautiful day with them.”
A bad night
They headed home around 9pm. It was raining heavily.
Rough seas and a high tide dumped water on the road where the road skirts Lough Foyle. When the accident occurred, the car sank face down in the sea.
Geraldine said she managed to escape the overturned car.
“I screamed and screamed and called out to Tomás, John and Amelia … I kept screaming for help,” he said.
Bystanders and emergency crews worked desperately to save the family.
She said: “They thought it was just me in the water and I was yelling at them … At first they couldn’t come down towards me because the water was very turbulent and I was in a lot of water and I was being tossed about by the waves. .. The car was upside down and I was standing on top of the car and holding onto a wheel. “
Rescuers were able to put a life jacket on her and pulled her out of the water with a rope.
She was treated by paramedics at the scene and said she stubbornly refused to be taken to the hospital until her family was removed from the water.
The local priest Fr. John Farren administered the last rites to John, Thomas and Amelia when they were brought ashore. After anointing each one, Geraldine made the sign of the cross on each of them.
She said Father Farren told her after the funeral that before she was removed from the scene in an ambulance, she had insisted on thanking every member of the emergency services within the cordon of the accident.
Now she faces life without her three most precious loved ones.
“If there is a legacy from John, Tomás and Amelia, it is that there is a lot of love out there,” he said.
He knows that a visible tribute to John for years to come will be the changing colors of the seasons in the shrubs, flowers and trees that John supplied to the people of all Inishowen.
Geraldine bravely reopened the garden center for business yesterday.
John showed Amelia and Tomás how to use apple pits to grow apple trees. Four apple seeds planted by Amelia, Tomás and John have grown to 12 inches tall in their pot. When Geraldine has a cast removed from her hand, she will plant the four saplings in a corner of the garden.
She hopes that the love she feels for her lost family will sustain her. And she repeated her wish that people don’t take love for granted, tell people that they are loved.
Looking back on that fateful day, she said, “Probably three or four times during the day, John turned to me and said, ‘I love you honey.’ And I said, ‘I love you too, honey.’
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