Saama Sane said that when he was a third-year student at the Noble and Greenough School in Dedham, Massachusetts, a white student repeatedly called him the N-word while sitting at a table in the library. Sane said he responded by shouting insults and ended up on the floor with a head key, all while five white students, some of them laughing, stared. He reported on the incident, and the school, which enrolls just over 600 and charges tuition of more than $ 58,000 a year for internal students, took disciplinary action against the student, he said.
But Sane felt suffocated at school, he told NBC News. And the wounds from that incident and many others seemed fresh even after graduation.
“I stopped loving myself because I realized that the community did not love who they really were,” Sane said.
Since graduating, he feels like he can finally be himself, said Sane, a sophomore at Boston College. He claimed his love for making music, something he felt he had to abandon in Nobles, as the school is commonly known, for fear that his classmates would make fun of him.
A spokesperson said the school was unable to comment on the details of the incident, but said: “Noble and Greenough School takes expressions of racism, spoken or physical, with great seriousness and responds accordingly.”
In recent weeks, black students and alumni of elite private high schools, including Nobles, the Brearley School in New York, the Phillips Academy in Andover, Massachusetts, and the Trinity School in New York, have created Instagram accounts where peers can share experiences anonymously with racism.
The accounts, with username names beginning with the words “BlackAt,” are part of a broader trend of students exposing racism through social media, Taylor Lorenz and Katherine Rosman reported in The New York Times.
While many schools have released statements promising to change, in some cases the damage has already been done, say students and graduates. In their Instagram posts, black students have described racist incidents, an inability to ask for help and support from teachers, a lack of confidence in authority figures, and general feelings of being strangers.
Catherine Hall, the school’s principal at Nobles, said the school listens to stories shared by graduates and strives to be more equitable and inclusive.
“We are working with a group of current student leaders and have also established a Color Graduate Task Force, a group of graduates spanning six decades, to help plan our work ahead of time,” Hall said in a statement provided to NBC. News.
Experts said the detailed experiences in social media accounts can affect the mental health of black students and how they approach education.
Black students are prepared for the academic stress of top private schools, said Howard Stevenson, a clinical psychologist and urban education professor who investigates racial trauma at the University of Pennsylvania. “But what really bothers them is their social status, having to navigate who they are as people of color,” he said.
Stevenson studies racial stress and how educators, community leaders, and parents can address it. She said black students often lack a sense of belonging within their private school settings, which, combined with the racism they experience, affects their long-term mental health.
JahAsia Jacobs, 22, graduated from Blair Academy, a private school of approximately 460 in Blairstown, New Jersey. “I don’t feel like I ever belonged to a ‘Blair community,'” he said. “I don’t consider myself part of the people that the Blair administration protects.”
Jacobs said that while she was at school, she internalized the pain and lost a part of herself due to the constant micro-aggressions with which she struggled. As a result, she said, “I really didn’t participate much outside of classes at Blair and beyond what I was required to do.”
“There were so many opportunities, and I really found myself not taking advantage of them, because I just didn’t want to put up with anything that was more racist or more alienating than I already had,” he said.
Jacobs said he became involved in extracurricular activities again only once he got to college, where he worked as an activist and hosted a symposium on endurance and race.
“I am very involved in all the things I wanted to do at Blair but I was not comfortable,” she said.
In a recent statement to the Blair community, Chris Fortunato, principal of the Blair school, revealed a plan to promote diversity, equity and inclusion.
“We are all committed to ensuring more fully that we are an inclusive, safe and welcoming community for every student and every adult,” he said. The plan includes increased teacher training, an audit of the curriculum, efforts to recruit more diverse teachers, and a commitment to engage in bias issues with transparency.
The sense of belonging that Jacobs said Blair lacked is essential for youth development, said Beverly Daniel Tatum, psychologist and author of “Why Are All Black Children Sitting Together in the Cafeteria: and Other Conversations About Race “
“When you are a teenager in particular, you try to define your sense of identity, who you are, what you hope to be in the future; if you don’t feel understood, you are likely to experience a sense of alienation and discomfort,” Tatum said.
The consequences of working to fit in
Kynnedi Hines, 17, said she has hidden a part of herself to fit in at Woodward Academy, a private school near Atlanta. She self-censors her speech and tries not to attract any unwanted attention to herself.
Anxiety is the residual effect of a racist encounter with his high school principal four years ago, Kynnedi said. In her post on the @blackatwoodward page, she describes the time when she and a classmate tried to plan a prom for their entire class. When they met with the director for approval, they were told that they could not have an “African American solo dance” and that they would have to obtain signatures from their white peers who supported the event.
When NBC News arrived, the director had no comment.
Stuart Gulley, president of Woodward Academy, said the former high school principal retired in May. He said the school will encourage teachers and faculty to participate in “diversity-intensive training,” which has been offered for at least 11 years. The school will also host discussions with trained teachers and facilitators to digest their mandatory summer reading of “So You Want to Talk About Race”.
“Over time, our hope is that we are going to create systemic change and that change will be long-term and will be periodically evaluated and reflect our commitment to diversity, equity and inclusion,” said Gulley.
A senior, Kynnedi is the captain of the basketball cheerleading squad and a tour guide for future students, but the encounter, which occurred her first year in Woodward, has stuck with her, making her feel intimidated and cautious to excel .
When black students experience racism, they are often so hurt by teachers that they sit still and say nothing like the perpetrator, Stevenson said. He added that black students need to know that their teachers will defend them and that acts of racism are not their burden.
What has stuck with Kennedy Austin, 22, is the feeling of helplessness in the face of authority figures.
“I don’t know what it is to be a white student, and if you feel it, but especially as a black student, you know that [teachers] you have much more power than you. And many times they can say or do whatever they want, “he said.
Austin started in kindergarten at Berkeley Carroll School, a private pre-K-12 school in Brooklyn, New York, and graduated in 2015. The stories he shares in the @blackatbc group span from elementary through high school. Her accounts include being hypersexualized by teachers during health class, a white classmate’s insistence that she would have helped her escape slavery, being forced to translate the word “bold” in class, and a general feeling. of doubt about his ability to enter the class. universities of your choice between peers and teachers.
She said that when given the opportunity to be herself and feel empowered, the belief that she had no power was already ingrained.
“I have never felt comfortable going to office hours or having those ‘I need help’ conversations with my teachers, because historically they have never been the ones to help me,” Austin said.
The exception occurred in the ninth grade, when black teachers allowed Austin to feel comfortable asking for support. Even then, he said, it took until his third year of college to really develop the skill.
A representative from the school wrote in a statement to NBC News: “We have been carefully reading and processing the stories of our black students and students on the Instagram ‘Black at BC’ and we share their goal of ensuring Berkeley Carroll is caring and supportive.” . cozy atmosphere for the black community. “
Austin said that although her primary interest is sociology, she feels more comfortable in the African studies department at her university because of the support she feels she will get.
Despite their trauma, the students have found ways to heal. Since graduation, many have found happiness at their universities and in new communities.
“The only reason I am thankful for Nobles is because I had to become a much stronger child because of that school,” said Sane.
But, according to Tatum, surviving schools is not what is in question. These students have the ability to survive, he said.
“The question is, should it be that difficult? It shouldn’t be.”
