Stephen Colbert
“Around this time of the election, every four years, people begin to worry about the October surprise,” Stephen Colbert said Wednesday evening, just 13 days before the election. And on Wednesday, “We were more surprised than October. We were horrified in October, following the conciliatory scene of Rudy Giuliani in the Borat sequel, following the hit Baron Cohen’s 2006 hit satire.
In a scene from a movie that has been airing on Amazon Prime since October 23, former New York mayor and Donald Trump’s lawyer follows the actor, who plays Borat’s daughter, as a journalist, going to a hotel suite for a cocktail; “Oul Oliani”, as Colbert called him, appears in the camera reaching into his pants and touching his genitals while sitting on the bed.
The scene was interrupted by Cohen, in Borat’s character, who walks into the room and says: “She’s 15. She’s too old for you.” “Moral authority in a situation should never be a great sign when a man hands a woman a bag of his own tunes,” Colbert Deadpend said.
Giuliani misjudged the criticism, claiming on WABC radio that his shirt was untouched because he was removing “electronic devices” from the film. “I’m holding my shirt. I assure you this was all I was doing.”
“Well, I’ll buy it, but I saw the footage,” Colbert said. “Why did you go to the bedroom at the suggestion of a young woman having a cocktail to take off the mic? I take the mic off every night. I never sat on a King-sized bed once and never started a fact-finding mission in my backyard. ”
Giuliani, like his legal client, has made numerous public mistakes, saying, “But we will never give up. [Trump’s] Foolishness denies the fact that he is also a ruthless monster who must be ousted from office first and eventually dragged into the men before The Hague, “said Colbert.” Because of all the horrors he and his administration have done, perhaps the most horrible is his family. Is anti-border policy “.
The government, ordered months ago to reunite separated families on the U.S. border by the administration’s “zero tolerance” policy, has still not been able to locate the parents of the 5,545 children, a court filing released Tuesday revealed. “We have two weeks to decide what kind of country this is going to be,” Colbert said seriously. “Either this inhumane behavior is punished by the voters, or just change to read the Statue of Liberty, ‘If you want to see the children again, give me your tired, your poor and half a million dollars unquestioning bills.’ ”
As Colbert continued, five hundred and fifty children were still separated from their parents, and there were still people who had not made up their minds. “There are still people who are going to vote for him. And I know people vote on a lot of different issues, but now that we know that these kids were stolen from their parents and can’t be returned because of the administration’s negligence, this is one of the things you can do. Voting. You can’t say what you can’t say. “
Jimmy Kimmal
The New York Times revealed on Wednesday that Trump has an undisclosed Chinese bank account and paid more than ૧ 8,8,000 in taxes to China between 2001-201 and 2001 – 50 percent of the US tax paid in the year 2011-201-201. More than 750. “I think at the end of the day we’ll find out if Hunter Biden is really Trump’s son in the real Darth Vader-y twist on this story,” Jimmy Kimmel joked.
“Now that we know that he is a longtime Chinese taxpayer, Trump has a right to be angry about China’s response to the coronavirus – he is practically a citizen of his country.
“Of course Donald Trump had a Chinese bank account,” Kimmel continued. “He had to – he got out of things to be a hypocrite. That was the only thing left. At the moment I wouldn’t be surprised to know that he has tunneled from Mexico under the country’s border. ‘
Samantha b
On the full frontal, Samantha BA “pre-election nightmare” AKA looks at how America’s voting system was “designed by jigsaw ps.” Americans voted in record numbers early, which is inspiring, but he added, but “Democrats have to show up, because our jigs are ever working hard to prevent a vote count.”
Republicans plan to spend 20 20 million on voting rights lawsuits in 2020 and, “as always, they are doing so under the pretext of preventing widespread voter fraud,” BA explained, “which they still haven’t proven, because it doesn’t matter.” T ”.
“Voter fraud is basically a fictional girlfriend who lives in the Canada of politics.” “Everyone knows he’s a fake, but that doesn’t stop Republicans from blinking on him.
He added, “More than a million votes could be cast in this election, partly because the rules for mail-in voting are different in each state and they are deliberately confused like a 12-sided Rubik’s Cube.” Mail-in ballots can be tweaked for postal issues, signature inconsistencies or false envelopes.
Still, the turnout so far is five times higher than it was in 2016 – an incentive for optimism for limited reasons. BA concluded, “We have only 13 days until the election.” “You have less than two weeks to mail in your absentee ballot, vote early or plan to vote in person in November. We all have to show up.”
