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Breaking news: armed people broke into a family’s apartment in bl. 305 in the “Meden Rudnik” complex in Burgas. The woman was locked in the bathroom, and the man under threat of death for his life … drank 4 bottles of brandy with his captors!
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Between Varna and Burgas, everything is “mieko” he said.
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“The face of a trapeze is not as important as the trapeze of a face!”
Burgas proverb.
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– His resume says he’s a Nobel Prize winner. In what area did you win?
– In Burgas.
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A hero from Burgas appears before the king:
“If you kill the dragon, you get the princess!”
“You’re crazy, maniac!” Fight a dragon for strandzhanka!
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– For the first time I travel with a pregnant woman on a train.
“But please sir!” I’m not pregnant !!!
– Well, there’s time for Bourgas.
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When a man from Burgas and a woman from Pernik get married, who will be the guests in stronger tracksuits?
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Early in the morning in a café in Burgas:
– Ino coffee.
“It’s not like that?”
– And we, tomorrow, we have it very clear.
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– How many children do you have?
– Two children and the third is on the way.
“And how are you sure it’s a son?”
– Well, how can you not be sure … yesterday he went to see his aunt in Burgas!
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The phone rings, he picks up the dog and says:
“Belt!
– Hi!
– Lean!
– Hi!
“Belt!
– Abe, I don’t hear anything, speak more clearly!
– B like Burgas, A like Atenas, Y like Uruguay. Arc!
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– What happens?
“You are licking me.”
– Pooh, it’s good to know you’re from Burgas.
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A boy was born with a walnut instead of a belly button. There were no problems until he grew up and became a young man, but then it began to prevent him from having a girlfriend, he became depressed. He went to find doctors, he walked, he walked, but no one could help him.
One summer night you were sitting alone on a bench by the sea in Burgas, cursing your fate, and were you not? Gosho Montyorcheto passed by the Moskvich service station.
“What are you cutting, light?” Montorcheto asked.
The boy told his difficult destiny.
“Ah, no problem, you!” Hey, we’ll fix it! – Gosheto said and took a key 27 from his back pocket.
He lifted the boys’ shirt, squeezed the key tight, struggled, gave in slightly, pushed even harder, gave in easier. He unscrewed the nut … and the boy’s ass fell off.
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– Miss, your ticket is for Harmanli and this train is for Bourgas.
“You see it!” Does it often happen that your driver gets in your way?
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Circulator left Sofia for Bourgas with a trailer full of chickens. Around Pazardzhik, a woman greets. He stops and she asks:
– Good morning, if you can for Burgas?
“No problem,” said the circulator, “but will you let me go?”
“Eeee, I can’t sir!”
“If you can’t, you will walk!”
And the circulation continued on the road. Plovdiv. A woman greets at a stop.
– Good morning, if you can for Burgas?
“No problem ma’am, but will you let me go?”
– Eeee, I can’t do those things!
“If you can’t, you will walk!”
100 km before Bourgas, a woman greets again, but with a parrot on her shoulder.
– Good morning, if you can for Burgas?
– Today they are all for Burgas. Maybe, but will you let me go?
“Well, as soon as I’m done, I’ll let you go!” But I also carry my parrot with me.
“No problem, give it to me,” said the circulation man, tossing the parrot to the chickens.
Upon reaching Burgas, the traffic officer left the lady, but forgot about the parrot. Our man goes to unload the chickens, opens the trailer and looks inside, not a single chicken, only the parrot sits and looks at it with elegance.
“Where are my chickens, plucked parrot?”
– Well, how where, if they don’t let go, they will go on foot!
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When the Japanese learned that the train ride from Sofia to Burgas was 9 hours, they thought that Bulgaria was bigger than China.
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Radio Yerevan was asked:
– What do they call the man Pedya? The elbow beard in Burgas?
After a short silence, the radio replied:
– The guy from the light, the madman from hell!
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The year before, Peña caught a lover in Burgas. The relationship was a secret. This year, the citizens of Burgas insisted for a long time that Peña come to Burgas. Finally, she made up an excuse and said to her husband:
– On foot, the mother of my best friend from Burgas died. I have to go!
“Why do not you go?” Pesho said. – Well, take Mom for a walk!
What to do, Pena wrote to Glarus: “We come with the mother-in-law. Bus station at 2.30pm Thursday. “The bus arrived at the indicated time, two black jeeps approached and each took Pena and the mother-in-law in different directions. Three days later, the jeeps returned to the bus station, Peña and her mother-in-law got out and got on the bus to Sofía. The situation was confusing and the daughter-in-law tried to start a conversation:
– Mom, now that …
“For you, I don’t know, daughter, but I am here nine days and forty days!”
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A young bartender travels by train. He is standing in a compartment with an attractive girl and, as usual, he speaks to her:
“Where are you going?”
– To Burgas.
“And what draws you there?”
– Like a locomotive.
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In the pub Nane gets drunk with the citizens of Burgas and Varna. The citizen of Burgas says:
– This is a cool pub, but in Burgas we have a pub where, when you order 2 brandies, they give you one without money.
The man from Varna is not far behind:
– In Varna it is better, there you pay 1 – one free, you pay 2 – two free.
Mint listens to them and says:
Neighbor Woote opened a pub on the other side of town. He pays you for the first brandy, then he pays for the second, then the third … and then he takes you to the back of the pub and arranges for free sex there.
The citizens of Burgas:
“Really?” And this happened to you?
Mint:
“No … to brother-in-law.”
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Burgas. Kinder garden.
– Baby, what are the creatures that can live on land and in water called?
“Sailors, ma’am.”
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– Do you know which rocky cape is located 54 km north of Burgas and 14 km south of Obzor?
– Emine.
– Amy, sit down. Couple.
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Friends talk on the phone. Finally one asks:
– How are you in the family? Everything is alright?
“Abe, I think my wife is cheating on me.”
– No way! And what did you judge?
– Well, we moved to live from Sliven to Burgas, and the plumber is still the same.
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– Hello, is it 112?
– Yes, tell me what is the problem?
– Stop the truck СВ 26 37!
– I do not understand!
– Look, I got stuck with my car between Burgas and Karnobat, I asked the trucker to take me to Petolachkata, but he forgot about me and we went through Petolachkata. Now it draws me to Sofia!
– Turn it on with the headlights!
“I looked at him, but he greeted me through the window and gave me a way to pass him.”
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