Adolescent Mental Health: How to Support Your Child in Your Epidemic

On average, calls and texts on the hotline occur between 30% and 40% during the summer. Children are less stressed during summer vacation. This year, the volume on the hotline increased by 6% during the summer, instead. A lot of contacts have also come through text. Many teenagers get stuck at home without having enough privacy from their families to make secret phone calls home.

With so many struggles, it’s an important time in your life to support teens. Here’s how to get started, how to teach resilience and warning signs that can signal to your teen that he needs extra help.

Follow your child’s lead

Three years of volunteering with the Teen Lifeline taught Alex about the power of good hearing. In fact, he doesn’t even give advice – no one does on the hotline.

“We’re here mainly to listen to clerks, just seem to have heard them,” he said. “They want to be able to get a chance to talk about anything going on without any reaction.”

“The good news is that teens usually take the lead,” he said. Worried about how they are coping with school? Listen carefully. “They’re very good at complaining about the school under all conditions and telling us what’s not working, and that’s okay,” Damour said.

As schools adjust to life in epidemics, many new disappointments are erupting, and Damore noted that it is important for teenagers to talk about what they are struggling with.

“One thing parents can do is just listen to a complaint, and not give solutions or disagree is a really valuable gift to give a young person,” Demour said. “They want someone to listen to them.”

Focus on resilience

If you want to move the conversation beyond compassionate listening, Mary Alward, a psychologist from Rockville, Maryland, suggests that you bring skills to build a sense of resilience and empowerment.

Alword, who has seen an increase in resilience following the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks, said those skills are particularly relevant in times of crisis. When starting a conversation about resilience in teenagers, Elward asks them to sort and categorize the issues they face.

“What can you control? What can’t you control what you have to accept?” She said. In an epidemic, many things – including disordered education, social unrest, and viruses – are beyond the control of individuals. Accepting it out loud is a relief.

And resilience, v lord said, is not just about tackling big issues. When teens identify things they can control in their lives, such as self-care and planning for the future, they also build the skills to adapt to everyday challenges.

Some of the things we can control include getting plenty of sleep, taking care of our body and mind, eating well and incorporating physical activity into each day. When the usual means of socialization are off the table, teenagers can think of a way to connect the novel, whether it’s a virtual get-together or an epidemic-safe trip.

“We know people who don’t take action feel helpless,” Alward said. “When you are helpless, you are more likely to be frustrated, and more likely to feel victimized.”

Look for signs that they need more support

If your teenager sometimes feels irritable or mild, it doesn’t mean they need to see a mental health professional.

“Let’s get in the mood,” Damour said. “It’s good for kids to feel bad or restless even in the afternoon or one day. We hope to see if they get upset, or have a painful eating sensation, the kids make their way through it and they’re able to move on.”

If you notice that they are not recovering from a bad week, it may indicate a more serious problem.

“This is a time of anxiety when a young person seems to be caught up in emotional conversations and unable to feel good or anything that upsets them moving into the past,” Demour said.

In addition, psychologist Alvard noted that sudden changes in behavior, such as mood swings or reckless irritability, can signal mental health conflict. “Sometimes irritability in children is really a sign of depression,” he said. “Sometimes it’s a hint or a real sadness.”

In normal times, solitude would be a sign, and Alvard pointed out that the Covid-19 restrictions meant some of these signs were being ignored.

“It’s easier to separate now, teenagers have less face-to-face contact with teachers, religious leaders and other adults,” he said. Isolation is a norm. It puts more emphasis on families to take note of warning signs, Vlward said, even though they face their own stress and discomfort.

“Much of this is up to the parents. In order for adolescents to be available, adults must also maintain their well-being. They have to take care of themselves so that they too can take care of their children,” he said.

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