- Aparna Shewakramani, a 35-year-old attorney from Houston, is a leading member of the Netflix cast. Indian matchmaking.
- She worked with Sima Taparia, a Mumbai-based matchmaker, to find love.
- In an interview with OprahMag.com, Aparna talks about Indian matchmaking, its Ongoing search for love and her life as a reluctant Netflix star.
It’s fair to say that Aparna Shewakramani from Netflix Indian matchmaking He didn’t know exactly what he was getting into when, lining up to board a plane, he completed an application to be on a dating show.
“I saw on Facebook that a friend of a friend had published the casting. Are you from South Asia? Are you still looking for your spouse? And I was like, Well i am boths. I applied it online. I didn’t even think about it, “Aparna tells OprahMag.com.
Two weeks later, a casting agent contacted Aparna. And two years later, that show, Indian matchmaking, landed on Netflix, making Aparna an almost instant internet star.
As Indian matchmaking‘s Launch, Aparna and its snippets of sound – instant memes, each and every one – have become an important element of coverage. She is cheeky about her tastes (traveling abroad, she doesn’t need to see her future husband all the time) and she doesn’t like it (beach vacation, spectator sports, kids at weddings). While working with matchmaker Simi Taparia, Aparna is also unapologetic about her specific standards and wishes: Men with a sense of humor or podcasts don’t need to apply. And when faced with Sima’s ever-present suggestion to fully commit, change, or twist around to find a husband, Aparna has an immediate response: she’d rather not, thanks.
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Aparna’s strong sense of self has attracted her fans, including her peers Indian matchmaking cast member Nadia Jagessar, who called her a “baby boss” on Instagram. Similary, Indian matchmakingAnkita Bansal recently expressed a feeling of camaraderie with her co-star. “She came up to me and said, ‘I loved how you and I are working to break a stereotypical South Asian expectation of what women should sound like in this process,'” Aparna says. But in an unexpected twist, at least for Aparna, it also made her the target of criticism and criticism online.
Netflix
Essentially, Aparna has become a litmus test, allowing viewers to assess their own beliefs about how a woman should approach the search for a partner. Is she, as Sima implies, a stubborn and demanding woman whose high expectations will leave her alone? Or is she the unexpected heroine of the show, someone who would rather be true to herself than immediately pleasing to the suitors? Or is there some middle ground?
The 35-year-old lawyer, who moved to the United States from India as a child, tells OprahMag.com that she accepted Indian matchmaking for a reason, and it wasn’t to be crowned with notoriety online, or to provoke debate, or to be an emissary of the arranged marriage process for Netflix viewers.
“I had no intention of speaking on behalf of the South Asian community, or sharing anything about the [arranged marriage] process. Was only, ‘Oh, could this help me find a husband? How cool Okay,’“Aparna says.
In short, she wanted to get married. And although, like the other couples on the show, she did not end up meeting that goal, Indian matchmaking changed it in other ways. Today, Aparna continues to work as a lawyer, in addition to running a travel company that started in 2018. Below, she opens up about Indian matchmaking“And the one that started once the show came out.”
What has your life been like since the show aired?
It has been really positive. I have a large group of friends and I have family all over the world, so it has been a lot of fun hearing from them. They have been very supportive and encouraging and have said how much they enjoyed it. Many people say, “That was a version of you.” I’m like, “Yeah, that was a version from me. “That’s for sure. But that’s what television is, you know?
When you were filming, did you have the program reception in mind? I imagine it could have been an inhibitor.
I didn’t think about it and you’re right, maybe it would have been an inhibitor if I had it is understood what would come in two years. But I literally signed up for the show on a whim. It took me more than six months to be selected, so I would forget and then come back, and then forget and come back. Life continued throughout that period.
Even when they were recording, two or three days passed and then they disappeared for months. It was never a point where it consumed my thoughts or had a really significant part of my life. It is interesting, today, that it is such an important part of my daily life, because the program never I was before launch.
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Before this, did you ever work with a matchmaker?
Actually, he had spoken briefly to a matchmaker before he turned twenty, I think he was 26. She is based in the United States and is also from South Asia. I approached her for a phone consultation. I think it’s $ 300 or $ 400 to talk to her for 20 minutes. And I did it, I paid for it. The matchmaker said: I mean, have you ever tried dating online?? At the time, nine years ago, that was not something that people actually did. She said, You’ll be fine. Don’t worry. Come back to me like in five years if something has changed, but for now, don’t worry about it.
I never spoke to that matchmaker again. More years passed, but I was always very open to pairing. I saw it as a way to meet someone. You ask your friends and you use your network. I have used everything. Why not use matchmaker?
How did the pairing experience compare to your expectations?
At first, I put a lot of pressure to try to communicate with Sima exactly what I wanted. I thought if she could be clear enough, she could get the rabbit out of the hat. My intention was: can I convey to Sima what I want, and very specifically what me want, not what that person in general wants, who is kind and good, but really what is important to me. I tried and tried and tried, and it just wasn’t happening.
Part of the process was that I said: Let it do its job. If you cannot identify with what I am asking, let me trust you and your experience. Let her choose the boys for me. That is what evolved: being open to your experience. The parties improved. We all saw that, right?
Some of your quotes have inspired memes. Have you been interacting with online followers?
At first, I was really interested in what people were saying. I thought there would be a great speech. And there has been, don’t get me wrong. Some people are insightful and have contacted me about how they appreciate that I am willing to share my opinions and speak my truth about what I want. They have said that they have not heard many South Asian women do that, not only in their lives, but especially on bigger platforms like this. If I can do that for one person, that denies a hundred people who are being negative or critical of a heavily edited show, which doesn’t make sense to me.
It seems that many people only listen to sounds. I forgot that there are spectators operating on that surface level. So I’m just ignoring that part and I don’t have time for that. I don’t think anyone should enable that in any way. I definitely said those things. It is definitely a part of me, but again, they are snippets of sound.
In one of those comments, you say that you didn’t feel that you needed to change for a man, that someone should accept you as you are.
What I meant by that was, As I am today, I am very proud of that. I have done all these things to evolve and grow. I still feel the same: if someone who meets me wants to change fundamental things about me, I will not change at this time.
If someone knows me today and says, “We don’t like the way you dress.”
or “We don’t like the way you maintain your home.” Well I’m 35 now. Those are the things that I don’t think I need to change at this point. Whoever comes to me will appreciate those things about me. I formed many opinions for myself through life experiences. And I would expect the same from the other person.
I don’t want to change the person in front of me. I want them to be unique and authentic. I want you to share that with me. And I want to appreciate those things about them that make them they. We are meeting in our thirties. We have formed and we are people as we are.
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Are you still seeing Jay from Indian matchmaking?
Jay is wonderful. We still talk and are friendly, but we are not involved in any way in a relationship. Ultimately, distance means those people will have to want to do the same amount of work. I’m not sure that will work for us.
I still talk to the guys who were split from the show, actually: Dilip, Jay and Shekar. We are good friends. Hanging out with three people you can relate to, who are good, friendly, and grounded, is a hit in my book.
Are you dating someone now?
I am not. At COVID it is very difficult to meet someone. I was about to start trying to get out, and then this happened. I heard that people are doing Zoom dates. I’d be open to that. You never know how you are going to meet the right person.
The biggest fan of Aparna might be watching Indian matchmaking from your living room.
You never know. And then we can have a wedding eventually, when this is all over.
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