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It’s been hard to find moments of relief this year, but the annual ranking of topical Christmas cookie jokes offers a few, with first place being taken by one topped off with a song by Chris Rea and Dominic Cummings.
The eighth annual ranking of the Gold television channel, which is chosen by a panel chaired by comedy critic Bruce Dessau, was put out to 2,000 voters who chose: “What is Dominic Cummings’ favorite Christmas song? Driving Home for Christmas ”, as the best joke of this year.
Other entries are based on topics more related to Covid, with jokes ranging from jokes about pirates and the R number to festive moans about reindeer and herd immunity.
Dessau said that during one of the “strangest and most turbulent years yet, we can always rely on British humor to get us through.”
Top 10 cookie jokes
1. What is Dominic Cummings’ favorite Christmas song? Driving home for Christmas.
2. Did you hear that the production was in Santa’s workshop? Many of your workers have had to isolate Elf!
3. Why didn’t Mary and Joseph come to Bethlehem? All Virgin flights were canceled.
4. Why is Santa’s reindeer allowed to travel on Christmas Eve? They have herd immunity.
5. Why did the pirates have to stay locked up? Because the “Arrrr!” the rate had increased.
6. Why is it better to think of 2020 as a panto? Because eventually, it’s after you.
7. Why couldn’t Maria and Jose join your business conference call? Because there was no Zoom in the inn.
8. Why can’t Boris Johnson bake his Christmas cake until the last minute? You don’t know how many levels it should have.
9. What do the Trumps do for Christmas dinner? They put a super extension.
10. Which Christmas movie was 30 years ahead of its time? Home alone.
