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This has just come in: Arsenal are not Barcelona 2011 and will not compete for the Premier League title next season. Shocking, we know.
Less is Collymore
Remember when Arsenal finished 8th in the Premier League, closer in terms of points to 12 than 4th, then won the FA Cup and Community Shield while their entire fanbase predicted a title challenge in 2020/21?
Stan Collymore does. And he’s here to “shake his head at the excessive celebrations” that followed Sunday’s victory at Wembley. He has even taken the time to give this straw man an extensive name while building it:
“This idea, spread on social networks by some of his followers, is that we are now facing a team that challenges the title.”
Are the thoughts of two or three Arsenal fans on Twitter, the hype from @MagnificentMikel and @XhakaLacaSaka to their 15 followers combined, really worthy of a dedicated weekly column on the Daily mirror? Is it’s how you wear that platform?
No one genuinely expects Arsenal to close a 43-point, seven-team gap with Liverpool in the space of a single summer under the guidance of a coach in his first full season of management. So thanks for telling us they won’t, Stan.
Arteta has clearly learned from his Manchester City mentor Pep Guardiola that any old pot will do when he nods to the fact that he has added to the club’s overall silverware account.
“But having watched English football for over 40 years, I can tell those two guys that the Shield is warm and cuddly and nothing more than that.”
Those are the words of someone who has ‘watched English football for over 40 years’ but won absolutely nothing, not even ‘a warm and caring curtain lift’ during his 12-year career. So how you know what ‘nothing more than that’ means is a mystery.
And ‘you can tell’ Pep Guardiola and Mikel Arteta what you want, but they probably won’t listen to you, like when you insisted that the former was “absolutely deluded … if he thinks he’s going to show up and surpass everyone in the Premier League.”
Two Premier League titles and a couple of Community Shields later, it’s really hard to say who won that argument.
Don’t get me wrong, winning breeds success and I understand that Arteta was probably trying to instill that in his players. “Keep in your head what it feels like to lift a trophy,” that sort of thing.
“But really, all they’ve done is win seven games to lift the FA Cup and the Community Shield and that’s a long way from having what it takes to win 15 or 38 trophies.”
That is really “all they have done”. As the only thing France did was win seven games to lift the World Cup. This is how knockout tournaments usually work. And pointing out the difference between them and the league’s campaigns makes you look pretty silly.
“My concern right now is that there is an expectation among Gunners fans that they are going to make this leap from winning trophies from level two to level one this season.”
There isn’t. There is a belief that they are moving in the right direction and making progress, but it is recognized that there is considerable work to be done to catch up. The only person who takes a “jump” here is you.
“So while it is well done and continues to go to Arteta, Arsenal still have a lot to do before they go back to competing for top honors.”
Thank you for joining us and everyone else in reaching the same conclusion, albeit considerably later.
“And the club’s Twitter account should understand that instead of insisting on that, we have just witnessed Guardiola’s Barcelona 2011 reincarnation as they did on Saturday.”
Did he really just utter 545 words because Arsenal posted this in celebration of scoring a really good goal against one of the best teams in the world at Wembley?
The beautiful game. He played wonderfully. 👌 pic.twitter.com/mKZWM2N2Bn
– Arsenal (@Arsenal) August 30, 2020
No There is no mention of Barcelona. Just the appreciation of a good goal and a grumpy jerk wondering why a fanbase subjected to 18 months of Unai Emery is starting to contemplate a brighter future. What fools.
Jack it in
The news of Jack Grealish call-up in England it has been greeted with jubilation by the British media, and all the national newspapers have provided back-page coverage. Take the Daily express for example:
Tuesday’s Express sport: Jack finally gets the call # morning pic.twitter.com/lWRNamJnh0
– Helena Wilkinson (@BBCHelena) August 31, 2020
It doesn’t seem like the right time to be “on a mission to prove Gareth Southgate wrong.” In fact, you are on the team. So maybe focus on justifying that I finally chose you, great friend.
Except that Grealish not only doesn’t say such a thing, but he doesn’t say anything at all in this particular story. There are no appointments of any kind. Just pure speculation: ‘Grealish’s absence from the original team fueled the theory that the snub was personal,’ and an attempt to create tension between player and coach that helps absolutely no one.
Welcome to the team and the ridiculous spotlight that goes with it.
Trip south
Sun I have exclusive quotes from Grealish, and he sure sounds as pissed off at Southgate as he is determined to show him how dumb he has been to understandably overlooking it All these years.
“I want to show the coach what I am, play my best and hopefully keep my place in the team.”
Oh.
“I have no idea if I will be selected this time. But if I am lucky enough to be called, I will give everything I have and try to learn from the experience. “
Oh my.
“I just want to lower my head and work hard.”
Steady on.
“I don’t know if I will have the opportunity to show what I can do on the field. But if that doesn’t happen, then I have to use every training session to show what I’m capable of and I’m sure I can. “
Southgate, basically.
Wag1
That same medium brings us the Donny van de Beek angle that everyone is desperate to read:
‘Meet Estelle Bergkamp, the daughter of Dennis & Wag from Man U target van de Beek’
Since when does “meet” mean “read more than 11 photos taken from “‘s Instagram account? And when did they get married simultaneously and remain single?
House of the nascent son
Apparently, at the same time, the 23-year-old couple had a stubborn grandson.
Football365 exclusive: Man United to hire Donny Van de Beek’s unborn grandson pic.twitter.com/7OwWMCUJdd
– Gareth (@ghiuotjerjgs) September 1, 2020
F365 Shit Day Headline
‘Neville points to five signings Manchester United still need to make’
It does not. Name five positions that you think need to be strengthened. And that is not the same. But everyone else was doing it so shit, why not?
Recommended reading of the day
Jonathan Liew in the new and old champions of Europe.
Marcus rashford being a king.
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