Amanda Kloots feels very emotional amid her husband Nick Cordero’s recovery from coronavirus complications (COVID-19).
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Nick Cordero and Amanda Kloots
On Monday night, Kloots shared that he had a “flare-up” when the 41-year-old Broadway star spent his 89th day in the intensive care unit, writing a long note in his Instagram stories: “I had a difficult day today. I cried all day basically. “
In the post, the fitness instructor, who shares 12-month-old son Elvis Eduardo with Cordero, revealed that he even began to question his faith during his collapse.
“I was also angry today. I was angry with God. I am praying and I have people from all over the world praying. I said to my mom and dad, ‘Why can’t he throw a bone at us? Sorry. But I’m angry with him.’ “, wrote. “I felt bad right after my outburst, but I had to get out.”
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RELATED: Nick Cordero’s Wife Says He Has Been “Told to Say Goodbye” But He’s Still Struggling As He Gets “A Little Better”
“Believing in God does not mean that you cannot question what is happening. Why do things happen? Why are my prayers not answered in my time,” wrote Kloots. “They taught me that it’s okay to question things in life. I think being brave enough to say it out loud really recognizes the fear you have deep down. And of course I have it. It’s impossible not to.”
“I broke up big today; at home, in the hospital in front of the doctors and sitting next to Nick,” she admitted. “I couldn’t keep it together.”
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RELATED: Nick Cordero’s Wife Tears Up When He Reveals His Condition Is ‘Going Downhill’
The mother of one continued to wonder how to “get over it and stay positive.”
“I recognize the day I had. It’s okay. It’s okay to cry, get angry, and say it’s not fair,” he said. “I will keep my faith and keep asking for miracles. I will put on my armor and walk higher tomorrow. I will do my best and I will get as big as I can.”
“This, these 89 days now, has been difficult. I broke up today. I’ll be back tomorrow,” Kloots continued.
“God doesn’t expect me to be perfect. He doesn’t expect anyone either.”
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amanda kloots / instagram
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amanda kloots / instagram
RELATED: Nick Cordero’s Wife Says He Has Lost 65 Pounds. Since hospitalization: ‘he is so weak’
Kloots previously mentioned the frustrating setbacks her husband has faced in the midst of her hospitalization, telling her followers that while Cordero is “fine” in his recovery, he is currently “in this vicious dance circle in the ICU, where one thing It goes well and another goes wrong, and what went wrong goes well, but what goes well and then goes wrong. “
“For me, right now, it’s like, ‘How do we get out of this vicious circle, this ICU circle?’ “He said in his Instagram Stories on Sunday night, adding that Cordero has been experiencing” carbon dioxide problems “and” blood pressure problems “lately.
“We really need those things resolved to move forward,” he said. “I hope, and I keep faith, that these things happen this week, that we see some kind of breakthrough.”
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Noam Galai / Getty Amanda Kloots and Nick Cordero with their son Elvis Eduardo
Last week, Kloots told fans that Cordero’s hospitalization has taken its toll and that it will be a “long time” before her husband is completely healthy. According to her, the actor is currently only able to move his eyes and part of his jaw due to his fragile state.
“Nick is profoundly weak. Imagine how it feels to get the flu and how it can take your body a full week to recover. Now imagine how Nick’s body feels, everything that has happened and how long it will take him to recover. This It will take time, a long time, ”he shared Thursday, along with a photograph of the couple standing side by side.
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“I give him as much energy as I can. I tell him goals the doctors would like to see. I insist that he CAN do this!” Added kloots. “People may look at me like I’m crazy. They may think I don’t fully understand his condition because I’m smiling and singing in his room every day. I’m just not going to be sad and sad for him or me. That’s not what Nick would want That is not my personality. I fight and I will continue to fight for Nick every day. “
Cordero was first admitted to the hospital in late March for what was initially believed to be pneumonia. He was later diagnosed with COVID-19 and has since experienced a number of complications, including lung infections and septic shock.
Amid Cordero’s hospitalization, his right leg was also amputated and he received a temporary pacemaker for his heart.
A GoFundMe page has been created to raise funds for your medical bills.
As information on the coronavirus pandemic changes rapidly, PEOPLE is committed to providing the latest data on our coverage. Some of the information in this story may have changed after publication. For the latest on COVID-19, readers are encouraged to use online resources from CDC, WHO, and local public health departments. PEOPLE has partnered with GoFundMe to raise funds for the COVID-19 Relief Fund, a GoFundMe.org fundraiser to support everything from front-line responders to families in need, as well as organizations that help communities. For more information or to donate, click here.
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