Daniela Elser: Kate’s wild gift to Prince Harry and how royalty celebrates Christmas

OPINION:

In a year in which the word “unprecedented” was thrown out with nauseating ubiquity, life before Covid has taken on a particular nostalgic glow. For the Queen, a woman whose entire life had been ruled by glorious repetition, this year and all of her new demands must have been especially challenging.

More so, perhaps, at Christmas.

The Windsors, like billions of families around the world, will celebrate the holidays this year in a whole new way, with their usual vacation plan gone out the window.

And boy, what glorious – and gloriously insane – traditions His Majesty and his group of titled descendants (and their descendants) routinely enjoy at this time of year.

While the Cambridges may not be making their way to Sandringham right now, the family Audi stuffed with novelty plastic animals and a minimum of 25 black tuxedos, we can still enjoy the madness and pomp of the usual Christmas festivities. royal family from afar and with hope. that this time next year they will return to their old traditions.

THE PRE-LUNCH

Just because his last name is Windsor, he doesn’t receive a coveted invitation to spend December 25 with Her Majesty at her Norfolk home, Sandringham. Such is the size of the 94-year-old woman’s extended clan, that she usually hosts a luncheon a week or two before the big day to celebrate with these B-list members, so to speak, of her extended family.

What would otherwise be quite a pedestrian event made headlines in 2017 when Princess Michael of Kent saw fit to wear a Blackamoor brooch, which has racist overtones, in what was Meghan Markle’s first big family gathering in Windsor.

A spokesman for the palace addressed the controversy, saying that “Princess Michael is very sorry and distraught that she has caused an offense.”

Given that the Queen has not returned to Buckingham Palace since March, it is obviously inconceivable that she will be hosting such a gathering this year.

We hope that in 2021, the world will turn on its regular axis again and the world will once again enjoy the annual sight of a group of Windsor, Ogilvys, Kents, Cambridges, Yorks and Gloucesters rushing out of the palace filled with Turkey. , claret and fighting indigestion.

SCHEDULED ARRIVALS

In a normal year, Sandringham’s guest list typically includes Prince Charles, Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, Prince Andrew, Princess Anne, Prince Edward, and Countess Sophie of Wessex, and all of their various children and grandchildren.

However, you can’t roll up when you want at Sandringham! Instead, according to royal biographer Brian Hoey, the week before the party, the Crown Equerry informs guests of the order in which they should arrive and at what time. It sounds wonderfully relaxed!

SHOWER CAPS AND FISH

Like almost anything, even tangentially connected to real life, giving gifts when one is part of the Queen’s clan is far from simple.

Rather than splurge on lavish prey, adult members of the royal family exchange joke gifts that in recent years have prompted Harry to give his grandmother a shower cap that reads “Not a life bitch” and a plastic fish that sings.

Princess Anne gave Prince Charles a novelty toilet seat seemingly in a blatant reference to reports that he travels with his family when traveling abroad; and Kate, Duchess of Cambridge, once, somewhat savagely before Meghan, gave Prince Harry a “Grow Your Own Bride” kit.

Overseeing all this madness is Prince Philip. When the guests arrive, they deposit each other’s gift on a certain table and he takes care of distributing all the rare and useless tchotchkes. The order of precedence is reportedly followed, of course.

Now all of this is done before Christmas day. That’s because they are actually of German descent (the family surname should be Saxe-Coburg and Gotha) they follow the Teutonic practice of exchanging gifts on December 24.

Sadly, we have no details on whether this custom will be carried out remotely this year, but I’d like to think that a sassy and stupid installment of news is in post right now, flying towards His Majesty and Philip of the family. .

IT’S TIME TO GET TO WORK

There is no rest for SARs! Even Chrissy.

One of the great events of the royal family’s unmovable annual calendar is the walk from Sandringham to St Mary Magdalene Church on the estate for the 11am Christmas service.

Thousands of people line the route hoping to catch a glimpse of the extended royal family, including the children of Windsor. After the service, the family fans out and accepts cards and gifts from the crowd.

Make no mistake, this is a work event and is generally a guaranteed public relations boon to the royal family, ensuring great bright and enjoyable coverage in the UK and global press. Even the smallest SARs take part, with Prince George and Princess Charlotte making their debuts last year.

It seems unlikely that we will see much of the family this year, although there is a chance that we will see the various royal houses launch a picture or two onstage on Christmas Day.

FOOTBALL SAMPLE

Even if the pandemic had never happened, this is an annual activity that probably would have been discontinued this year. For years, Princes William and Harry reportedly enjoyed their own festive ritual in the form of a football match between royalty and staff.

Royal commentator Richard Kay has previously revealed that “Harry and William, when they were teenagers, were wildly competitive, you know they weren’t holding back.

“They would cut each other if they went for the ball together.”

EQUIPMENT CHANGES

While the rest of the world has to decide between lazing around in their pajamas or changing into the newest Santa Claus look they choose for Christmas Day, a celebration in Windsor requires multiple costume changes. Seven indeed.

Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York, revealed in one of her biographies that different outfits are required for Christmas Eve afternoon tea, Christmas Eve dinner, Christmas Day breakfast, walk to church, slash lunch, Afternoon tea, something to go for a snack to come in and then dinner (which is etiquette).

A TELE POINT

Brits from across the country flock to the small screen to watch the Queen’s annual address, and the Windsors are no exception. In the afternoon, they gather around Sandringham’s box to watch Gan-Gan’s teleconference. It is not known whether Her Majesty ever asked Meghan, a professional actress, for some advice on camera.

SO. MUCH. FOOD

There is one thing that definitely does not happen during a royal family vacation and that is someone losing a gram of weight. Instead, they enjoy sumptuous meal after meal with everything from good British fry to lobsters, foie gras, turkey, frozen cakes and Christmas pudding on the menu.

WHO IS TO DRINK?

While the Queen has a huge wine cellar with some of the best drinks in the world, it is said that before dinner Her Majesty serves guests a much stronger drink.

According to royal biographer Ingrid Seward, Her Majesty likes to serve her guests “lethal martinis” before dinner, proving that the 94-year-old monarch knows a thing or two about getting the party started.

THE WEIGHING

This is really weird. Supposedly King Edward VII wanted to make sure his guests were actually eating during all of these meals, so he started the tradition that his guests were weighed at the beginning and end of their visit to verify that no one had been holding back . (God forbid the guest who once politely asked about the possibility of a salad)

According to biographer Seward, who has impeccable sources, “fun” weighing is a custom the Queen has continued, even using a pair of antique scales.

GET YOUR WEAPON!

What better way to recover from all that food and alcohol than a day in the frozen forest killing small birds? The Windsors indulge in one of their great loves, hunting, on Boxing Day with an annual pheasant outbreak.

This particular event made headlines in 2018 when it was wrongly claimed that Harry had skipped this annual outing because his wife Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex, pressured him not to participate. (Actually, the man had to return to London for work commitments.)

With the family being spread across multiple manor houses and palaces this year, at least 2020, Sandringham’s pheasants can rest easy.

• Daniela Elser is a real expert and writer with over 15 years of experience working with several of Australia’s leading media outlets.