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As more parents decide to return to work after having their babies, experts worry that early childhood centers are being used as de facto parents.
Daycare can be great for a child to develop a schedule, prepare for school, and make friends, yet experts are concerned that the number of children enrolled in early childhood centers has the ability to lead to a generation of angry and anxious children.
The early care industry is booming with more than 4,500 facilities across the country. Figures from Statistics New Zealand show that 199,000 (64%) of all preschool-age children are enrolled in some form of early childhood education.
The main reason parents give for using childcare arrangements was work commitments.
Where being a stay-at-home parent was something that was done for years, in June 2020 only 12.6 percent of all people who were not in the workforce reported that their main activity was taking care of a child.
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Experts attribute the decline in stay-at-home parents to increased gender equality, the rise of young women’s tertiary education, their participation in the workforce, the cost of living, and the cost of raising children in New Zealand.
Figures from Stats NZ show that there were 56,100 women with a child under 12 months of age in September 2020 and more than half were employed or looking for work.
In the same quarter, 18,600 men were not in the workforce due to childcare, compared with 14,200 in September 2016.
Leading parenting specialist Nathan Wallis says that being in child care before the age of three can lead to aggression and slow the development of social skills.
He explains that when you are at home with your baby and they hit you, even accidentally, you wouldn’t send them back and could use it as a teaching moment instead.
“But when your 8-month-old is in daycare and you can’t control his arms and you reach out and slap a 12-month-old, the 12-month-old will slap you back.”
But he says it takes more than having a stay-at-home parent or one who works to dictate the outcome.
Many people can be in daycare as early as a week old and be perfectly fine, and people can have a stay-at-home parent for up to five years and still be an anxious adult, he says.
“It is a combination of your genes and what happens in your environment.”
Wallis says that the culture of parents needing a break is relatively new.
“I know parents need a break, I’m not saying no, but there are other ways to have breaks besides babysitting, getting more family support, getting the other parent more involved.
“I’d say you don’t need a break from your baby in the first two years, hold on, but that’s a bit harsh.”
However, if the mental health of the parents suffers, then a break is a good idea, he says.
Many think the child will gain great social skills by going to daycare, but Wallis says the benefit doesn’t really come until after age three.
“There are no research-based benefits for a child in child care under the age of three. 100 percent of the benefits are for the economy and for the parents.
“The only children who are better off in a nursery for less than three years than at home are those who live in a home that is so abusive that they should be removed by the authorities.”
Peter Reynolds, executive director of the Early Childhood Council, says that while Wallis is correct that daycare can lead to aggression and slow social development, there are many benefits.
He says that early childhood teachers spend up to five years in college and are well trained and educated about the importance of the first 1000 days of life and how to handle different types of children.
“All of that includes things like the development of neuroscience and the behavioral characteristics of children in child care, so in a conventional child care center, it is led by a teacher, where you have those qualifications instead. [aggression] it is much less likely to occur. “
The cost of early child care in New Zealand is offset by government subsidies in government approved facilities and supplemented by a specific subsidy for children ages 3 to 5, known as 20 hours free.
Parents whose income is below a certain level may qualify for another hourly allowance beyond the first 20.
Reynolds says there are two reasons parents enroll their children in early childhood education: financial need and the desire to give their child the best start in life.
“The diversity that has occurred in early childhood education is primarily driven by parents and their desire for choice and flexibility. So now we have daycare through kindergarten, play centers, and home services. “
Clinical psychologist Kirsty Ross says there is too much pressure on parents to make the right decision.
He said that while some people love being stay-at-home parents, others feel like they can be better parents by doing a combination of paid work and unpaid work at home.
“The idea that you have to be a stay-at-home parent to spend that time with your child is actually not true and means that people who don’t have that option can feel paralyzed, which hinders their enjoyment of the time they spend. . to have.
“Whatever time parents have available with their children, stay in the moment and present, with the phone off, without work, really connecting with your child.”
– Parts of this story have been modified to more accurately reflect that the show’s focus is on fathers, not just mothers.