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Money is causing relationship stress for 20 percent of New Zealanders, and even those making more than $ 150,000 a year are struggling, research from the Commission on Financial Capability shows.
Their survey of more than 3,000 people found that one in five had relationship problems with their partners, family, or close friends due to financial concerns.
The 18- to 34-year-old group reported the highest degree of relationship stress due to money, at 24 percent.
It declined with age to 21 percent of people ages 53 to 54 with problems, 14 percent of people 55 to 65 and 7 percent of people over 65.
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People with incomes of less than $ 10,000 were more likely to experience financial relationship problems, but even 21 percent of those making between $ 150,000 and $ 200,000 a year reported relationship stress due to money.
The Commission’s personal finance leader Tom Hartmann said having more money could create more problems. “Having a higher income means you need to make more money decisions and there can be stress from that.”
He said that while people making $ 200,000 would be fine, they weren’t “insanely rich” and it was possible that their lifestyle could stretch their income.
People would have trouble talking about money for a variety of reasons, he said, including their own backgrounds and the fact that it was often considered taboo. But he said open conversations were needed to allow people to work together. “Together we can accomplish more than we can on our own.”
EnableMe financial advisor Hannah McQueen said the higher people’s incomes, the worse the problems can be.
“The person who is not committed leans towards ‘there is a lot of money, it will be fine.’ It gives them permission to disconnect. “
He said there was evidence that the more money people made, the less wealthy they were because it gave them an “optimism bias.”
She said the couples she dealt with frequently said they had no shared financial goals or similar monetary personalities.
Simon Maude / Things
About 20 percent of New Zealanders say their relationships are affected by financial stress.
Some would want to work on it, but others said they didn’t want to think about it, he said.
But she said her experience was that it was less of a concern for young people. It was when they reached their 40s and realized they had a set amount of time to achieve their financial goals that the disparities became more obvious.
He said that the Covid-19 pandemic had enabled many people to tackle problems that they had not been able to before because financial resilience was at the front of people’s minds.
Hartmann said financial stress was often related to mental health problems.
“Good relationships with partners, family, and friends support good mental health and resilience, but because opposites often attract in relationships, partners will have different attitudes and habits when it comes to money,” he said. . “No two people will ever have the same experiences or earn the same amount; this can put stress on any relationship. “
Ricky Wilson / Stuff
Financial adviser Hannah McQueen of EnableMe said the higher people’s incomes, the worse the problems can be.
He said that people who discuss money with the family should avoid guilt and find common ground with an agreed basic budget.
“It is important to be honest. There is no point in hiding things like debt – make it clear and get it all done in one conversation. You’ll be glad you did.
“If your partner is controlling your money, accumulating debt in your name or preventing you from being financially independent or earning your own money, that is abusive. Make sure you get the help you need in this situation. “
Financial advisor Liz Koh said that people often have different attitudes toward things like saving and spending.
“The key to resolving these differences is to recognize that they are just differences and that there is no right or wrong. It is a matter of understanding each other, finding common goals and setting priorities. It is also important that each partner has access to an agreed amount of money that they can spend on whatever they choose without having to answer to the other person. “
