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WHO needs Gareth Bale when you have Harry Kane and Son Heung-min?
The Welsh Tottenham superstar could only watch from the bench in awe as their dynamic duo sealed another victory.
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North Londoners had been under pressure before Kane threw a corner for his South Korean partner in crime, Son, to head home with the winner with just 14 minutes remaining.
This is the 29th time the couple has combined to find the network.
Only former Chelsea duo Frank Lampard and Didier Drogba have worked together to score more in Premier League history.
Both, of course, worked under current Spurs coach José Mourinho.
But rarely must the Special have seen a more telepathic association than the one he has now playing for him.
He must give the Portuguese great hope that he can finally be the one to bring back Tottenham’s glory nights.
Make no mistake, this was not a performance or a classic encounter.
The best you can say about this is that at least it didn’t cost an extra £ 14.95 to view.
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Forget pay-per-view, this was more pay-per-view.
Make no mistake, fans who were unable to see this from inside Turf Moor due to Covid restrictions were the lucky ones.
Those who were showing no symptoms will certainly feel worse having seen this.
When it comes to boredom, this one was strictly level three.
And while the boffins in the Oxford and Cambridge labs are frantically working to try to create a vaccine for the coronavirus, they may want to genetically engineer something that will prevent soccer fans from having to suffer from something like this again in the future.
Painful, lethargic and nauseating … that’s just three words to describe this accessory.
Let us pray that it does not catch on.
Otherwise, all Premier League television screens will be blocked for the foreseeable future.
It was in stark contrast to the last time Tottenham faced a claret and blue team.
That was, of course, the Sunday before last when West Ham rallied from 3-0 against with three goals in the final eight minutes to draw 3-3 in one of the biggest comebacks in Premier League history.
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There wasn’t a hint of that drama here.
José Mourinho predicted in advance that we would not see goals, and he was right.
It was one of those nights where both sides could have been better if they had called a day before kick-off and saved the rest of us the hassle of going through what is sure to be one of the most boring matches in the Premier League, not. football history
Boss Sean Dyche celebrates eight years as Burnley’s boss on Friday, having led them to promote Prem twice during his reign.
Eighth anniversaries often deserve a bronze gift, but the modest Clarets boss would no doubt settle for another season without being relegated.
No matter the bronze, the financial constraints Dyche is being asked to work under appear to be stone age.
More names of stars came out the door than on Turf Moor this summer, and you wonder how much longer you can keep pulling rabbits out of the hat while keeping them top-flight.
The danger for Dyche is that despite his reputation, if he fails to save them from the fall again, they could end up taking him with them and he may never get a high-level job again.
Like those Nigerian pirates on the Isle of Wight, there is a growing feeling that perhaps he should have jumped ship sooner.
These clubs drew 1-1 in the corresponding clash here in March, which was their last match before the lockdown in March.
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Tottenham made SEVEN changes to their starting line-up since Thursday’s 3-0 Europa League win at home to LASK of Austria.
The return of Hugo Lloris, Eric Dier, Son Heung-min and Harry Kane underscores the depth of strength they now have on their roster.
One of the criticisms directed at the former Spurs coach, Mauricio Pochettino, was that he had an excellent first eleven, but the rest were missing.
That’s something you can’t match at Mourinho now, whose bench last night included Joe Hart, Gareth Bale, Sergio Reguilon, Carlos Vinicius, Erik Lamela and new kid Joe Rodon.
While Dele Alli, Davinson Sanchez and Steven Bergwijn weren’t even named on Matchday 18.
Some may believe that this shame of wealth makes life easier for Mourinho, but in reality it is quite the opposite.
The Special now has no excuses.
He cannot claim, like many of his predecessors, that he has not been endorsed by the Spurs leadership.
His counterpart Dyche made just one change with Matt Lowton coming in for Erik Pieters.
Josh Brownhill won what will surely be on the fastest yellow cards of the season when he was booked for knocking down Tanguy Ndombele with less than a minute left on the clock.
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The first half was so boring that even many of the fake TV viewers thought of leaving early.
Ashley Barnes put the ball into the net for Burnley, but it was so offside that even VAR Craig Pawson didn’t bother to repeat it.
Ashley Westwood’s 25-yard drive had Spurs goalkeeper Lloris move to his right to sustain
Tottenham had scored 11 goals in their first two away games of the season, winning 5-2 at Southampton and 6-1 at Manchester United.
But the Londoners posed a much less offensive threat here, not even registering a shot on goal in the first half.
In fact, it was just another clever save by Lloris, this time to his left, that prevented Johann Berg Gudmundsson from giving the hosts the lead with a 30-yard shot just before the break.
The second half was no better.
Burnley nearly grabbed a first goal when Kane cleared a Tarkowski header from the corner off the line.
Kevin Long then denied Son a goal with a brilliant blocking tackle.
It looked like he was going to end goalless until Kane nodded in a corner kick in the 76th minute for Son to head home.
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