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He accepted the news that he waited with joy
“It was a beautiful love story. It was my first love. It seemed that this man was for me “, – Gabriel Linds began the story about her young friend Tomás.
She met Black when Gabriel was still in school and Tom had already graduated. According to Gabriel, her parents were against friendship, they did not like that Tom was a few years older than her, from another city.
“After high school, I went to study, but my mother still opposed this friendship, so it was as if in the distance we met on weekends,” said the interlocutor.
Gabrielei was 18 when she found out she was pregnant. They had been friends with Tom Black for about a year and a half. The woman says she accepted the message with joy.
“I really wanted to have children. Now I realize that it’s funny, only after finishing high school, no education, no steady job, but then it seemed like we were going towards that. For me personally, that pregnancy was not unexpected. It was only later that I realized that Tom saw everything, apparently differently, ”Gabrielė recalls.
Tom, when he heard this message, was not afraid, according to the interlocutor.
“We told the parents, then they all seemed to understand where it was leading them, and even the pressure of getting married earlier and starting a family started. Allowed to live together. But then I started to feel that our relationship was getting cold: I felt cold for him, there was more anger. It seemed that I no longer wanted that life together, but they threw me out, my mother said: now go and live, because you wanted, “continued Gabrielė.
The couple rented an apartment and settled together. I planned a wedding.
He blamed the child for being born unhealthy
“It’s hard to say why everything happened the way it did, but now I think it had to be. I had a cold, I went to the doctor, but I ended up with a less sensitive, less empathetic woman who was very afraid of me. Then I got a fever, I took aspirin, I was still in the early stages of pregnancy. The doctor took away his morale, since without taking medication here, my son can be born sickly, ”shared the interlocutor.
Get an abortion, I don’t want anything with you anymore.
Gabrielė said that she reacted very sensitively, and when she returned, she told Tom everything.
“I don’t know if that was the reason, but then I started hearing from him that I was guilty of taking drugs, that I didn’t want to have degenerative children. I saw it as a pretext for him to end our relationship. And I finally got it from him: do an abortion, I don’t want anything with you anymore. She left me a week before the planned wedding, “Gabrielpenter said.
She felt pressure from her mother to abort
When she was left alone, her mother began to pressure her to have an abortion: “I lived with my parents, I was completely morally broken, I had no support, only the pressure from my mother to solve this problem.”
After visiting their gynecologist with their mother, blacks found out that it was a little late for an abortion. Then the doctor says to my mother: Come on, I’ll show you how the baby’s heart beats. Apparently, seeing that image inside my mom, something worked. The pressure is gone, “Gabrielė said.
The girl was born healthy. Tom no longer appeared in Gabriel’s life.
“He didn’t see his daughter, he didn’t even call to ask who was born. When I waited, we went to the notary, then he confirmed that the baby is his, he will not give up paternity. But since he didn’t show up himself, and I didn’t want to deal with him anymore, I didn’t look for him either. So he is very sorry in our life, but he no longer participated ”, said the interlocutor.
Gabrielė studied, started working and her mother helped raise her daughter: “My mother’s help was fantastic, I am very grateful to her.”
Scanpix photo / mom with baby
The current husband met when the daughters were just one year old
Gabriel is now living the life he dreamed of as a teenager. He has a large and beautiful family: a loving and loving husband, an adult daughter, and four more children, the youngest, twins, four.
By the way, Gabrielė met her current husband when her daughter was only one year old. Since then, the black has been together. Married, he adopted Gabriel’s daughter and raised his own.
“Now that I look back (on the relationship with Tom – aut.), I am glad that everything happened that way, because I know that nothing would have come out. It was my teenage dream, a bit unrealistic. Everything happened, it that was supposed to happen. The result is that I have a fantastic daughter who is already 22 years old, “said the interlocutor.
Gabrielle says she is no longer angry with her daughter’s father, and recently she told the whole story to her daughter.
“It just came to our knowledge then. She never listened to me, so I didn’t say anything. Only this summer did I dare. Apparently, the very subject itself was painful. I would very much like my daughter not to get mad at him for accepting everything as It is. Maybe even when they meet, they want to meet me, “thought the woman.
Women are advised to find someone to talk to
When asked what advice she would give to women facing such a dilemma, Gabrielle said that she would unequivocally go for help.
Those problems always seem bigger when you keep them to yourself and when you share them with someone else, they start to diminish.
“Seek, speak up, don’t close, hate one. Contact the Crisis Pregnancy Center or your own spiritual teachers. I work with the Crisis Pregnancy Center myself and I think there is a great need for what they do, the support they provide to women. I hadn’t succeeded, I felt completely alone. There were really all kinds of thoughts at that stage, and the darkest ones, I couldn’t imagine where or to whom I could turn, what the situation could be for me. It was a difficult moment .
Those problems always seem bigger when you keep them to yourself and when you share them with someone else, they start to diminish. In general, just having someone lead you by the hand makes it easier to be there. So I encourage you to find people you can talk to. Because there are definitely those who will respond and help, if only you allow it, ”Gabriel advisedė.
The Crisis Pregnancy Center provides assistance to those experiencing unplanned crisis pregnancies, loss of a baby due to miscarriage, premature delivery, or abortion.
It also organizes self-help groups during crisis pregnancies and newborns.
You can request help: tel. 8 603 57 912,
[email protected]
www.neplanuotasnestumas.lt
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