Death at the time of Covid, an open letter from the daughter of a Reggio Calabria patient who passed away in recent days.

Death at the time of Covid, open letter from the daughter of a patient from Reggio Calabria who died in recent days: “I write with mourning in my heart, with the discouragement that those who have lost a mother know well”

We are approaching the tenth month of the pandemic, and in addition to the obvious economic consequences, this absurd phase that we are experiencing leaves us with many reflections every day, often bitter. It will seem obvious, anachronistic, but it is singular to reflect on how, although death itself is a terrifying date, today it acquires even sadder connotations, because dying in times of Covid can be even sadder than in normal situations. The overcrowding of hospitals, the impossibility of accessing them, especially for the relatives of patients, is a reality for all to see. It is evident how much for a patient, beyond the purely medical and clinical aspect, human contact with family members or in any case with close people counts, an aspect that today is increasingly inexplicably inhibited by the security protocols of many hospitals. The protests and exasperation of those who in these long months have to face the emergency with family and friends hospitalized in hospital wards for illnesses not related to Covid multiply every day. For many of them, sadly, the epilogue is one of the most dramatic. As for a lady from Bova He died a few weeks ago of a serious heart disease after being hospitalized in the cardiology department of the GOM of Reggio Calabria.

We propose below the daughter’s open letter, an outlet through which the lady, in addition to expressing the pain of the loss of her mother, focuses on one aspect, that of lack of humanity, which in places like Hospitals should represent an essential cornerstone and unfortunately often becomes a mirage: “I write with mourning in my heart, with the despair that those who have lost a mother know well. I entrust my pain to this short letter, not because you believe that more could have been done, I certainly do not want to enter into the merits of the work of the doctors, moved as I am, by nature by a good faith that encourages me and has always encouraged me. . I lost my mother without being able to see her again from the moment she entered the room and this is a pain that I will carry with me forever. I received fragmentary information, many times discordant even after a very short time from each other without the possibility of understanding what the clinical picture really was, suspended between hope and despair in a continuous alternation of feelings that devastate like few things in the world , all the way to the end, what you don’t expect, at least not that way, not with that coldness, not with that speed. All of this gives me some bitter and painful reflections. In the first place, it reveals to me how, apart from the protocols, the humanity of health personnel counts many times, because, no matter how much the protocols are respected, it is inconceivable to take advantage of pain, to give a rule to suffering, to end diseases. . In the first place, as soon as we accused the disease, we took my mother to the nearest health center, precisely to the emergency room of the Tiberio Evoli hospital in Melito Porto Salvo, and right there, regardless of the medical implications, we found a great feeling of humanity, for which I would like to thank Dr. Bruno Nucera who on the occasion showed the true spirit that any doctor should embody, the care, delicacy and closeness of those who are dealing with the suffering of others. When we arrived at the GOM, unfortunately for us family members, the nightmare started and ended like it couldn’t be worse.

I repeat, I will not go into the merits of the validity and timeliness of the care provided, I would not have the elements to do so, it is my intention to focus attention on the alleged negligence or omissionate conduct. On the other hand, I highlight all my bitterness for the lack of transparency, but above all of attention towards us relatives, like so many others, at a tremendous turning point in our lives as the loss of a father always is. There is no regulation, there are no protocols that can justify the lack of humanity, which in this case should have resulted in a direct and constant communication relationship, in the name of clarity and punctuality, which unfortunately did not happen. Nor is it conceivable that a sick person is deprived of the affection of his loved ones even at the moment of death, it is not understood how the GOM is unable to regulate, like many other Italian hospitals, a program to enter and visit relatives, at least one for each patient. Of course, these are my posthumous considerations that are valid as a personal outburst of a daughter hunched over from suffering, but not anachronistic for it, because my hope is that already in the near future, no one will be forced to bear the weight of pain that we are living. Happening in these weeks I hope that those who are competent can intervene in this sense, out of respect for life and return the most noble and just meaning to the noble profession of doctor “…Carmela D’Aguì, just a daughter.